Chalkboard: No one wants to hear from my armpits
Couch: Repeat of the couch gag from "Sunday Cruddy Sunday" where the couch sinks like the Titanic after an iceberg passes by the family.
(At the gross-out contest)
Lisa: This is so embarrassing!
Marge: Lisa, did anyone force you to come here today?
Marge: Well, no one's forcing you to stay.
Lisa: Fine, then I'm leaving.
Marge: You're not going anywhere.
Lindsey Nagel: Do I detect a hint of sarcasm?
(The sarcasm detector starts beeping.)
Professor Frink: Are you kidding? This baby is off the charts!
Comic Book Guy: Ooh! A sarcasm detector! That's a REALLY useful invention!
(The sarcasm detector explodes.)
Homer: You're not going to ask me to pose nude, are you?
Photographer: Well, yes, unless you have issues about revealing your body.
Homer: I don't, but the Block Association seems to. THEY wanted a "traditional" Santa Claus.
Hibbert: (through an intercom) Lisa Simpson, are you ready to go on a voyage of intellectual self-discovery?
Lisa: I think so.
Hibbert: Is that a pie, or a quiche?
Lisa: A pie.
(Some murmuring over the intercom)
Hibbert: You may enter.