Chalkboard: I will not bite the hand that feeds me Butterfingers

Couch: Just as the Simpsons are heading for the couch, two repo men come in and take it. While Homer sobs and Marge looks confused, the kids are content to sit on the floor in front of the TV.

Marge: Dear Artie.
Selma: Dear Hottie!
Marge: Congratulations on your recent TV appearance.
Selma: I wanna sex you up! Your love slave, Marge.
Marge: (gasps) You can't use the word "Sex" on the internet!
Selma: Watch me!

(Homer & Lenny approach the oilfield boss' shack where the sign reads: "Roughnecks Wanted - Dangerous Work - Free Burial)
Homer: Do you have any jobs for a man who wants to die? Something indoorsy.
Lenny: Close to a bathroom?
Boss roughneck: I'll put you on Rig 13 as soon as they burn off the corpses.
Homer: This job'll be perfect. I'm gonna leave this world the way I entered it: dirty, screaming and torn away from the woman I love.
Lenny: Ho ho. Quick and pointless... that's the death for me.

Homer: Okay, Ziff. You get her for the weekend; but no funny stuff. And by funny stuff I mean hand-holding, goo-goo eyes, mis-directed woo – which is pretty much any John Woo film.
Arnie: Your wife's virtue shall remain as untouched as Bill Gates' weight room.

Dr. Hibbert: Here's what it costs (hands Homer a note)
Homer: Interesting… here's my counter offer (scribbles 'do it for free' on a note and hands it to Dr. Hibbert)
Dr. Hibbert: Ahehehehehehe…. get out.

This episode's title is an adaptation of “Indecent Proposal”, a 1993 movie & novel of the same name by Jack Engelhard, that starred Robert Redford, Demi Moore, Woody Harrelson.