Chalkboard: Poking a dead raccoon is not research
Couch: The Simpsons sit on the couch as normal, but now all of them look like Moe Szyslak (the bartender).
Chloe (knocking on trunk): Lisa, what are you doing in there?
Lisa: Praying to Buddha, Jesus, Spongebob--there's no time to be picky!
(in heaven, Buddha, Jesus, and Spongbob are looking down)
Buddha: Perhaps we should help.
Spongbob: Screw her! (Does his crazy laugh.)
Kent Brockman: Mr. Mayor, just how many illegitimate children are you hiding?
Mayor Quimby: Kent, I'm hiding nothing ... except this puppy. Look into his eyes and tell me I'm lying.
Kent Brockman: Well, I'm placated, and so are all my friends in the local media.
Chloe: So, Marge, what's exciting in your life lately?
Marge: Well, uh... Oh, we finally found out why the dog was scooting around on his butt all day. Turns out he had an impacted anal gland.