Chalkboard: None

Couch: Repeat of the claymation-animated couch gag from "The Girl Who Slept Too Little" where six balls roll to the couch and form into Homer, Marge, Lisa, Maggie, Bart--and Gumby.

(referring to the sign on the back of Homer's head)
Marge: Wow, it glows in the dark?
Homer: (worried) It's not supposed to.

Mrs. Pummelhorst: This is very emotional for me. I'm taking a leave of absence. I'll return in the fall as Mister Pummelhorst, your new chop teacher.
Skinner: We're telling you children now, so you can adjust and not make jokes.
Nelson: Looks like there'll be some new wood in chop class.

Marge: Sweetie, if someone is bullying you, you should tell your teacher.
Bart: But it's the teacher, who is bullying me.
Marge: Well, tell your regular bully. He won't like it one bit.

Willie: I don't need your charity. Not as long as I got a pan over my head!
Marge: That's not a pan, it's a colander.
Willie: Oh, so that's where all my soup went.

Willie: Thanks for taking me in misses. Please accept this in return. It's my most prize possession. It's a sculpture made of children's lost retainers.

Homer: How long is this commercial anyway?
Eli Stern VI: I don't know. I've uh, never made it to the end.

Coach Krupt: Muntz.
Nelson: Do your worst. I'm drunk.
Coach Krupt: Well, welcome to AA: Always Attack-him. (throws a dodgeball at Nelson)

Willie: What flows from the nose does not go on my cloths.

Mr. Largo: (Sitting on Willies tractor) Oh, for goodness sakes. (The camera zooms out and reveals that he is located on the school building) How did I get up here?

The man in the commercial for big blue pants already took place in his seat and the music fades down before Homer talks to Mr. Stern again. After they made the deal the commercial is still running at the point where the music is still running and the man performs his "belly dance".

The episode title and plot are taken from the musical My Fair Lady. Read more about it in the wikipedia article.

Coach Krupt's question "What is your major malfunction" was used in the Stanley Kubrick movie Full Metal Jacket from 1987. Read more about the movie in the wikipedia article.

The sign "Worldwide Pants, we had the name before Letterman" refers to the production company Worldwide Pants Incorporated owned by David Letterman. Read more about the company in the wikipedia article.

Jimbo bets that Kearney can't go around the World in 80 days. This refers to the novel Around the World in 80 Days written by Jules Verne. Read more about the novel in the wikipedia article.

The Couch Gag is the same as in the episode 17x02 The Girl Who Slept Too Little.