Otto: That's not a song! Real songs are about deals with the devil, far off lands where you'd find smoke in relation to water.
Otto: Oh, knock it off Kearney. Why are you still in this school anyway? We were in third grade together.
Kearney: Stupid school, don't know how to teach me.
Bart: Let me drive. I go through yellow lights.
Nelson: Whow, your mother must dance in the nicest strip club in town.
Fat Tony: Michael, my son, here is your book. And never forget, the divisor goes into the dividend.
Ralph: (as Fat Tony's son is walking by) His daddy putted bullets in my daddy. My daddy had to potty in a bag.
Willie: Argh, look at all this puke! Why did I come in on my day off?
Lisa: Urgh! There is a triple-A battery in my Macaronian cheese.
Lunchlady Doris: It counts as a vegetable.
Fat Tony: Milhouse, may I borrow your three-ring-binder?
Milhouse: Garfield or Love is?
Fat Tony: Uh, I prefer the cat. He hates Mondays. We can all relate.
Fat Tony: Sadly my Anna Maria was whacked by natural causes.
Marge: Oh, you're a widower.
Fat Tony: I bring flowers to her grave every Sunday.
Marge: Oh, flowers every week. I wish I was dead.
Fat Tony: Welcome to my home.
Marge: Huh, must have cost a fortune.
Fat Tony: Actually, you can really keep costs down, when you don't pay for materials or labor or permits or land.
Homer: Wow, your paintings have brush marks. Huh, and your statues have wieners.
Fat Tony: Your words honor my family.
Dante: We meant no disrespect Fat Tony. We were simply trying to kill you
Homer: (After tasting a delicious soufflé) This must be what angels taste like.
This episode's title is an adaptation of 'The Cook, the Thief, His Wife & Her Lover', a 1989 French/British romantic crime drama written and directed by Peter Greenaway starring Richard Bohringer, Michael Gambon, Helen Mirren, and Alan Howard