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The War at Home
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| Title: | Pilot |
| Episode Number: | 1 |
| Season: | 1 |
| Season Episode #.: | 1 |
| Production Number: | 475294 |
| Original Airdate: | Sunday September 11th, 2005 |
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When Dave doesn't let Hilary date an older guy, she bends the rules by bringing over a new "Study Partner". Meanwhile Mike coincidentally begins spending more time at his friend Seth's house around the same time Seth's mom gets breast implants. Meanwhile Larry dresses up like a girl in order to prove a theory, which only furthers his parents suspicions of him being gay.
| There are no foreign summaries for this episode
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| If you call the number Dave gave (516) 507-2370 you are greeted with a message from Dave himself! Each time you call (or maybe every so often) the message is different. The one I got was: "Hey this is Dave, if you want to have sex with my daughter then stay away from my house. Because I'll come and break your neck". It's interesting, try it out and see what you get.
| A "viewer discretion" advisory aired before the beginning of this episode.
| This episode was dedicated "In Loving Memory of Ellen Idelson."
| The musical Larry is watching is West Side Story.
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| Vicky: Oh, and I told Larry he could stay over at Kenny's Friday night.
Dave: Again?
Vicky: Yeah.
Dave: At 15, you don't have sleepovers, okay? Whatever you do with a buddy, you can finish by 10:00. I'm telling you, he's gay.
Vicky: You don't know that.
Dave: Vicky, when you don't know if someone's gay or not, they're always gay.
Vicky: He's not gay. He's a normal kid. All right, he's not normal. But he's not gay.
| Dave: See? Wh-What is that about? Since when do boys watch TV together?
Vicky: They got to do something before they make out.
| Dave: Taye. Tha-Tha-That's an interesting name.
Taye: Yeah, it's short for "Boo-tay."
| Mike: Hey, I'm going to Seth's. He's boring, but at least he has the new PlayStation.
Dave: Isn't that the kid who's mother just had a boob job?
Mike: I guess.
Dave: Oh. Call me when you need a ride home.
| Dave: What are you up to?
Hillary: Nothing. Taye's coming over, we're going to study.
Dave: On a Saturday? Shouldn't you be at the mall with your girlfriends, you know, getting makeovers, and stealing stuff?
| Dave: My dad had it easy. In his day, if you brought home a paycheck, and didn't beat your kids, you were father of the year.
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| After the camera angle changes, the cigarette that Dave just switched from his right to left hand is back in his right.
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| Dave: I only have ONE simple rule for dating my daughter. If she sees your penis, I'll cut it off.
This is a jab at the show "8 Simple Rules For Dating My Teenage Daughter".
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