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The War at Home
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| Title: | It's a Living (1) |
| Episode Number: | 11 |
| Season: | 1 |
| Season Episode #.: | 11 |
| Production Number: | 2T7610 |
| Original Airdate: | Sunday January 08th, 2006 |
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Mike scores extremely well on a test, and he is offered to move up into the honors classes. This encourages Vicky to return to her fashion-executive job, which means a bigger salary, but less time at home with the family. This time apart means more chores for Dave, which he does not like. Meanwhile, Larry submits a poem which was actually written by Kenny, and takes a little to much credit for it.
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| | Guest Stars | | •Tom McGowan | played | Joe | Recurring (4th appearance) |
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| Apparently, Vicky worked in a doctors office part time before getting her job as a sportswear buyer in Bergdorf's.
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| Larry: Really? You're proud of me? Wait, how many beers have you had?
| Vicky: Apparently, everybody in his grade took some sort of aptitude test and Mike...
Dave: What, failed? Copied? Spelt his name wrong?
Vicky: No, he scored really high.
Dave: Oh. I always expected to get a call about one of the kids being really high. I just never thought it would be about a test score.
| Kenny: Well, I have tons of poems in my journal. I can give you one if you want.
Larry: You keep a journal?
Kenny: Yeah.
Larry: And you write poems in it?
Kenny: Yeah.
Larry: Isn't that a little... ?
Kenny: Hey, you want one or not?!
| Dave: I'm not ambitious? What does that mean, huh? I go to work. I make a living. How do you think we could afford this nice house?
Vicky: Well, the fact that the living room was still considered a crime scene when we bought it didn't hurt.
Dave: Oh, the smell went away after a couple of months.
| Vicky: Hey, I'm a mother. I have to take care of our kids when they come home from school.
Dave: Look, maybe working part-time made sense when they were young, but Vicky, let's face it. The next diaper that's gonna be changed in this house is gonna be one of ours.
| Dave: Joe, do you think I lack ambition?
Joe: Cable out last night and you had to talk to the wife?
| Mike: Okay, here's the deal. If I go into the honors program, I'll have a built-in excuse for getting bad grades.
Hilary: Wow, maybe I should go into the honors program.
Mike: On the other hand, everyone's gonna call me a geek, and I'll have no chance of landing a hot girl. I mean, I'll be facing Larry-like odds.
Hilary: Oh, yeah, I see your point.
Mike: But being in honors could actually improve my chances. There are 22 hot girls in the regular program and about 300 guys, which means I have a 1-in-14 probability of getting one. But in honors, I'd be the one normal guy competing for the one cute girl. My odds go from 7% to 100%. So, balancing all those factors, what do you think I should do?
Hilary: I think you should go into the smart group 'cause I don't even know what the hell you're talking about anymore.
| Vicky: So, today, I decided to call my former assistant, Diane Starky, you remember.
Dave: No.
Vicky: Yeah, yeah. You know, the one with the short red hair.
Dave: I never heard of her.
Vicky: She never wore a bra.
Dave: Oh...
| Mike: Okay, there are 24 brussel sprouts which need to be eaten by the end of the week. Tom eats two every other day. Sally eats two three days in a row, but not on the fourth or sixth day. And Jimmy cannot eat any on the same day as Tom. How many brussel sprouts does Jimmy eat on the third day?
Dave: None. 'Cause no one eats brussel sprouts. They taste like crap.
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| It's a Living
"It's a Living" was a catchphrase often spoken by dinosaurs in the Flinstones who were used as machines.
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