Crystal Fair: Oh, you must be Colonel Richmond. Crystal Fair's my name.
Colonel James Richmond: How do you do?
Crystal Fair: Yes. And you're Artemus Gordon!
Crystal Fair: Oh, Jim's told me so much about you. I feel like we're old friends, too.
Artemus: Thank you. Why, you dog. How'd you keep this one undercover all this time?
James: Because I never saw this women before in my life.
Colonel James Richmond: What are you going to do about it?
Artemus: I don't know. I think I may even learn to grow fond if it after a while.
Colonel James Richmond: What? I'm not talking about your blasted tattoo! I'm talking about Jim!
Elisha Calamander: The couch you are rising from once sagged beneath the weights of the Queen of all the Assyrians. May one hope that you rested as well as that scarlet-lipped Semiramis herself.