Jim, Artie, and a Federal marshal ride out to intercept a stagecoach as it makes its way through the countryside. They see a woman passenger inside with a male passenger and figure that the driver and his partner riding shotgun took on the women to look convincing. The three men ride down and order the driver to halt. He does so without putting up a fight and asks what is going on. The marshal presents a warrant to search the stage and says that they’re looking for boll weevils. The shotgun man opens fire, wounding the marshal, and Jim tackles them. The marshal shoots the driver, Artie takes on the male passenger who ends up shooting himself in the struggle, and Jim captures of the shotgun man. Artie opens the door for the woman, who falls out, revealing that “she” is a mannequin. The head falls off and the agents confirm that there are hundreds of boll weevils inside...Read the full recap
Marshal: If those two on top start any trouble, we’ll have to be careful of the ladies.
Artemus: Oh ho, I’d be delighted to look after the lady.
James: Always the gallant.
Artemus: It's not that I'm complaining, you understand, Jim, but why is it I'm always the one who ends these long-winded wordy messages to Washington?
James: Because, Artie, you have such a marvelous command of the English language.
Artemus: Oh, that's good. That's very kind.
James: I thought you'd like that.
(starting a fire)
Tucker: When you’re done on one side, be sure and turn over. You’ll making better looking corpses.
Artemus: Boy, he really burns me up.
Artemus: Joanne, the wine is getting warm, dear...
James: Artie, have you no romance in your soul?
Artemus: Yes, I do. That’s why I only have enough pheasant for two.
The disguises Artie mentions are from "TNOT Legion of Death," (Aaron Addison), "TNOT Samurai" (Paulo Martinez), "TNOT Arrow" (Lt. Jonathan Greeley), and "TNOT Cut-Throats" (Jake the piano player)