Narrator: And then I kissed her, on the eye, and then she kissed me, on the eye.
Narrator/Adult: One of the major international events of 1972 occurred in the hallways of my alma mater. It was of course the recent arrival of...Inga Finnstrom, McKinley High School's first Swedish exchange student.
Paul: Can you believe we sent Marvin Grotsky to Venezuela and got her back?
Narrator/Adult: It was the greatest trade in the history of the United States.
Ricky Halsenbach: Man, if I didn't already have a date, I'd ask her to the spring formal. Hey, it was just a thought!
Kevin: Who're you taking, anyway?
Ricky: Ramona Storkman.
Kevin: That's great, Ricky.
Narrator/Adult: Still, even Ramona Storkman was better than nothing.
Paul: You got a date yet, Kev?
Kevin: Uh, no. No... not yet. I'm still... thinking about it. (gazes at Inga)
Paul: Her? You're dreamin'!
Kevin: Hey, I was just looking.
Narrator/Adult: But face it, who was I kidding? A girl like that? A schlub like me? Nothing short of miracle could ever bring us together. Until, that is, fate stepped in. Fate in the form of... Winnie Cooper.
Kevin: I, uh, saw you in the library today.
Winnie: You did?
Kevin: Yeah. You were with, uh... that new girl uh... what's her name?
Kevin: Oh, yeah, that's it. Inga. How do you know her, anyway?
Winnie: Kevin, do you have the hots for Inga?
Kevin: No! No, I just, saw you two, together, and, I, I, thought it was... interesting. That's all.
Winnie: OK. [prepares to leave]
Narrator/Adult: : Just one more tiny detail...
Kevin: And, maybe you could fix us up?
Winnie: Excuse me?
Kevin: Well, I just thought that maybe you could put in a good word for me. You tell her what a nice guy I am and everything.
Winnie: Kevin, are you sure she's your type?
Kevin: What's that supposed to mean? What's my type?
Winnie: I don't know, I just thought you'd be going out with someone a little less...
Winnie: Kevin, I talked to Inga.
Kevin: You did? Really? What'd she say?
Winnie: She said she'd like to meet you.
Narrator/Adult: Yumpin' Yiminy!
Kevin: No kidding.
Narrator/Adult: And suddenly all bets were on.
Kevin: So, do you uh, think she'd go to the spring formal with me?
Winnie: I'm not sure, but I do know that she doesn't have a date yet.
Kevin: Thanks, Winnie. I knew I could count on you.
Narrator/Adult: What a girl! What an ex! Always there for me. No strings attached...
Winnie: Kevin? Just one thing...
Winnie: Matt Stevens.
Winnie: You know, the new guy. He's in your history class?
Kevin: You have the hots for Matt Stevens?
Winnie: No. I just want to meet him.
Narrator/Adult: Which of course was a reasonable request. Still...
Kevin: Winnie, I don't think he's right for you.
Winnie: What do you mean?
Kevin: Well, he didn't even know when the War of 1812 started.
Winnie: Kevin, come on. You know, I'm doing you a favor.
Narrator/Adult: And of course, stated that way, what choice did I have?
Inga Finnstrom: Hi
Matt Stevens: Hi
Narrator/Adult: And with those polite formalities out of the way, it was time for the main event. Time to play, the dating game.
Winnie: So, Matt. Um, how do you like McKinley so far?
Matt: Well, it's the kind of school, you'll never forget... forever.
Narrator/Adult: So much for bachelor number one.
Winnie: I know exactly what you mean.
Kevin: So, Inga. Are you having fun in America?
Inga: Oh, ja. I like it.
Kevin: Yeah. Me too.
Matt: Hey Winnie, what are your three favorite activities?
Winnie: Well, I like to read, I like to play tennis... and I love to dance.
Matt: I love to do all those things, too!
Inga: Ja! Me too!
Winnie: Oh, what a coincidence!
Kevin: (mumbling) It's amazing.
Narrator/Adult: OK, it was clear the time had come to dump the chitchat and get down to brass tacks.
(Kevin opens mouth to speak)
Matt: Hey, Winnie, would you go to the spring formal with me?
Winnie: Sure, I'd love to.
Matt Stevens: Great.
Matt: So we'll talk later, I gotta get to class.
Winnie: Me, too. Come on, Inga.
Kevin: (upset) Winnie, wait.
Winnie: Oh, yeah. Sorry Kevin.
Narrator/Adult: Hadn't we forgotten something here?'
Kevin: Inga, you wanna go to the dance with me?
Inga: Ja, sure.
Narrator/Adult: Yes! And with those two words, the deal was sealed. Winnie and I were on our way to the spring formal...
Matt: Hey, guys! Why don't we double?
Kevin & Winnie: Double?
Kevin: So Inga, how do you like school so far?
Inga: Oh, I like history, I like English.
Kevin: I like lunch, heh heh. It was a joke.
(Winnie laughs hurtfully)
Narrator/Adult: Something funny?
Matt: So, Winnie, who are your three favorite movie stars?
Winne: Um... Well, let me see...(Kevin chuckles) Never mind.
Narrator/Adult: Heh heh.
Inga: Oh, I love American music, especially The Beatles.
Kevin: Really? Yeah, me too. Hey, remember when the Magical Mystery Tour album came out?
Kevin: I couldn't believe how many kids didn't understand it. (Winnie giggles) What?
Kevin: No, c'mon, something must be funny.
Winne: Well, just... you didn't understand the album, either.
Kevin: What are you talking about?
Winne: You didn't even know who the Walrus was.
Kevin: Well at least I don't buy every Donny Osmond album that comes out.
Winne: I don't listen to Donny Osmond.
Kevin: Oh, come on! You have that huge poster of him hanging over your bed.
Winne: (to Matt) It was a phase I went through. It was a long time ago...
Kevin: It was last year!
Narrator/Adult: And there, in a nutshell, you had it--the double date from hell.
Matt: You know, Donny Osmond is the kind of the guy you'll never forget forever.
Narrator/Adult: And the best part was... it was all just beginning.
Narrator/Adult: Boy, I was mad. Boiling. Furious...But as we danced, something strange started to happen.
Winnie: Matt's a nice guy.
Kevin: Yeah, well. Inga's "nice," too. She's just a little... empty.
Winnie: Matt's a real dope.
Kevin: C'mon, he's not that bad.
Winnie: Neither is Inga.
Kevin: Yeah. She's got a nice hair.
Winnie: Matt's got nice hair, too.
Kevin: They both have nice hair.
Narrator/Adult: Like I said... (Winnie leans her head onto Kevin's shoulder) ...something strange.
Kevin: I should get back.
Winnie: Me too.
Narrator/Adult: I wasn't exactly sure what had just gone on out there on that dance floor. Whatever it was, it was crazy. It was confusing. It was dangerous. And I really, really liked it.
(walks away starring at Winnie)
Paul: Hey, Kev. You going up to the point afterwards?
Kevin: I'm not sure yet.
Paul: Yeah, I know what you mean. I'm not sure, either, I mean you have to kinda play it by ear, 'cause you know...
Narrator/Adult: I knew Paul was talking--his lips were moving and noise was coming out, but my mind was elsewhere. Suddenly, it was something beyond our control. Fate, destiny, magic...Whatever it was, Winnie and I had become two runaway trains, two heat-seeking missiles, being inexplicably drawn back together.