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The Wonder Years: Lunch Stories

School lunch finds Ricky trying to finish an assignment, Wayne trying to win a bet, Chuck trying to get a date and Kevin trying to get out of donating blood.

Episode Info  

Episode number: 5x18
Production Number: S0059118
Airdate: Wednesday March 18th, 1992

Guest Stars
Andy BermanAndy Berman
As Chuck Coleman
Demian SladeDemian Slade
As Joey Spinoza
Eric FosterEric Foster
As Neal Pemish
Lindsay SloaneLindsay Sloane
As Alice
Richard FancyRichard Fancy
As Dr. Valenti
Scott NemesScott Nemes
As Ricky Halsenbach
Seth GreenSeth Green
As Jimmy Donnelly
Troy FrominTroy Fromin
As Slovosky
Jean SincereJean Sincere
As Nurse
Laurel MoglenLaurel Moglen
As Sheila McCaffry
Richard ChaimRichard Chaim
As Nebbish
Main Cast
Fred SavageFred Savage
As Kevin Arnold
Jason HerveyJason Hervey
As Wayne Arnold
Danica McKellarDanica McKellar
As Gwendolyn "Winnie" Cooper
Josh SavianoJosh Saviano
As Paul Joseph Pfeiffer
Daniel SternDaniel Stern
voiced Adult Kevin Arnold
ArtistSong TitlePlayed When
Henry ManciniPeter Gun Theme 
The RevingtonsPapa-Oom-Mow-Mow 

Episode Quotes
Chuck Coleman: I don't believe it. Isn't she beautiful?
Narrator/Adult: Chuck Coleman had one obsession in life. Sheila McCaffrey - clarinet player.
Chuck: I mean, she is hot!
Kevin: Yeah, yeah, yeah...
Chuck: I mean, not just regular hot - I mean, she is...
Kevin: & Chuck: Diaphanous.
Narrator/Adult: For the past three weeks, Chuck had been using that word. I'm pretty sure he thought it meant..."stacked".
Kevin: So, why don't you just ask her out?
Chuck: You can't just make a move on a girl like that! You have to find the precise moment! The perfect thing to say. The right shirt!
Narrator/Adult: Face it. The guy was scared witless.
Kevin: (walking back to a lunchroom table) Chuck?
Chuck: What?
Kevin: We're here.
Chuck: Oh. Hey, Ricky.
Ricky Halsenbach: Hey, guys.
Narrator/Adult: That was the thing about lunch...You always sat with the same people because...well...You always sat with the same people.
Ricky: (looking at Chuck's food tray) Hey - I get the pickle.
Chuck: Uh.
Ricky: Please.
Paul: Hey, guys! What?
Chuck: (to Paul) Nice tie.
Kevin: What...Your mom dress you again?
Paul: Oh, very funny. Look, I-I got a debate tournament this afternoon...I gotta look nice.
Narrator/Adult: Now, of course, Paul was the brain of our group. So we treated him with the respect he deserved.
Chuck: Well, sit down...before somebody sees you!
Paul: Oh, remind me to laugh.
Ricky: Hey, are you gonna have those mashed potatoes?
Paul: Ricky, I just got here.
Alice: (running up to the table) Ricky! Ricky! Did you do your report for Calvin's class?
Ricky: ...what report?
Alice: The report! The one that's due...Today! A thousand words on the day in the life of a citizen of ancient Rome - and if I don't get it done, I'm gonna fail. I'm gonna look like an idiot!
Ricky: Are you sure it's due today?
Alice: Fourteen people told me it was.
Ricky: Well, well, how come we didn't know about it?
Alice: I have to go. I have to find a pencil.
Ricky Halsenbach: Oh, my God!
Kevin: Ricky! Calm down.
Ricky: A thousand words...What am I gonna do? I-I...I don't know...
Narrator/Adult: It was inevitable. Every day, somewhere between fish sticks and Jell-O...Ricky Halsenbach would have at least one academic crisis.

Wayne: I need this, OK?! (grabs Kevin's soda)
Kevin: Buy your own!
Wayne: It's not for me! It's for...Him.
Narrator/Adult: We called him "Maniac". You know the type. You never knew where he came from...What he was thinking...How many family members he might have killed...
Wayne: Some guys...Bet me twenty bucks I couldn't... find out Maniac's real name. Heh-heh
Kevin: And you think a can of soda's gonna do it?
Wayne: Nah-nah-nah-nah. It's just the ice-breaker.
Kevin: You're out of your mind.
Wayne: Hey. For twenty bucks, I'd lick the paint off our house with my tongue. Heh-heh.
Narrator/Adult: I got news for ya. A year later - he did it, for ten.

Ricky: An ancient Roman...lived in a Roman house...with a Roman wife and spoke Roman to a lot of Roman people. What do you think so far?
Paul: Don't change a word.
Chuck: Have you noticed Sheila's skin? It's like that thin paper that we use in typing class.
Paul: Sheila, Sheila - why don't you just go talk to her?
Chuck: I can't...
Ricky: Why not?
Chuck: She's eating.
Paul: It's a cafeteria, Chuck.
Chuck: Paul, you can't ask a girl out when she's eating! It's like a landmine. What happens if she smiles, and she has all these particles of tuna on her teeth? She'd be humiliated. You can't recover from something like that.
Kevin: Chuck, will ya stop acting like such a geek?
Chuck: Well, what do you mean?
Kevin: If you want to ask her out...ask her out.
Narrator/Adult: And, from small ideas do great decisions grow.
Chuck: You're right, Kevin.
Narrator/Adult: So began that long march. That test of fortitude to manhood.
(Chuck walks away, stops and bends down)
Paul: What's he doing?
Kevin: He's tying his shoes.
Paul: But he's got loafers on. OK - here we go.
Kevin: Now, what?
Paul: He's tucking in his shirt.
Ricky: It's tucked, ya doofus!
Paul: Who's he waving at? OK - he's gonna do it now. He's running away.
Kevin: What's the matter with him?
Paul: He did better than I thought he would...
Kevin: What happened?
Ricky: You were right there!
Chuck: My part was off.

Wayne: Look! I'll level with you. I made a bet for twenty dollars, that I could find out your name. Now, I'll give you ten bucks right now...if you will just...tell me your name! Please!
Maniac: Florence.
Wayne: Excuse me?
Maniac: My name's Florence.
Wayne: Florence. Well...thanks a lot! I'll never forget this, Florence! Hee-hee.
Maniac: Just one thing. If I find out you told anyone, I swear I'll kill you.

Chuck: Hi...I'm Chuck.
Sheila McCaffry: Hi.
Chuck: I was just wondering, um...if maybe you'd like to...Uh...go out sometime.
Narrator/Adult: Amazing. After three months, Chuck had finally done it.
Sheila: Gee, Chuck...That'd be nice.
Narrator/Adult: And hit pay-dirt. And that's when it happened.
(Chuck's eye starts twitching and his lunch tray shakes)
Chuck: Uh, How about Friday?
Sheila: Friday. Uh, Friday...I have band practice this Friday.
Chuck: Saturday - uh, we could go skating.
Sheila: Oh...Gee...guests from out of town.
Narrator/Adult: It was horrible. Right before our eyes...The kid was twitching his way toward total self-destruction.
Chuck: Uh, how about next weekend?
Sheila: Uh, I think I'm gonna have to study that weekend.
Chuck: The weekend after that?
Sheila: I may have band festival.
Chuck: Um, you know, maybe we should just try this, ya know, when you're not so busy.
Sheila: Yeah. It was great talking to you.

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