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(Change Layout)Two and a Half Men  
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« Season 3   Settings    Season 4 (Printable Guide) Season 5 »
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Season 4
73 :04x01 - Working for Caligula (Sep/18/2006)
Alan wins $500,000 but then finds out Kandi does not love him. A month later Alan is back living with Charlie, who has gone back to the bachelor life. Now, Alan feels he is an all time failure, and no one can cheer him up.
Guest Stars: Marisa Tayui as Sally, Sandra McCoy as Tina, Mia Kelly (1) as Cindy, Katie Weaver as Marie, Melanie Lynskey as Rose
Director: Gary Halvorson
Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
74 :04x02 - Who's Vod Kanockers (Sep/25/2006)
Alan feels guilty when he learns that Charlie and Mia didn't tie the knot because she had wanted him and Jake to move out. Meanwhile, Charlie and his rock star neighbor don't get along.
Guest Stars: Natalie Denise Sperl as Janie, Steven Tyler as Himself
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 
75 :04x03 - The Sea is a Harsh Mistress (Oct/02/2006)
Charlie attempts to surf in order to impress a beautiful girl -- with disastrous results. He later tells Alan that when his life was hanging in the balance, their deceased father came to him and made a request that Charlie's loath to fulfill.
Guest Stars: Sami Reed as Dottie, Brian Patrick Wade (1) as Sam, Robert Clotworthy as (Gangter boss)
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
76 :04x04 - A Pot Smoking Monkey (Oct/09/2006)
Alan is determined to gain custody of his and Kandi's dog after she walks away from their split with both the condo and the car. Having also lost everything to Judith following their divorce, Alan decides to hire the best lawyer he knows -- hers.
Guest Stars: Michael Patrick McGill as Officer #2, Andre Ware as Officer #1, Christopher Neiman as Joel
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Maria Espada Pearce, Bill Prady | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Susan Beavers
 
77 :04x05 - A Live Woman of Proven Fertility (Oct/16/2006)
When Judith announces she's remarrying, Charlie and Alan find themselves helping her fiancé get over his cold feet so that Alan will finally be free from paying alimony.
Guest Stars: Ryan Stiles as Herb, Ireesha as Woman
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
78 :04x06 - Apologies for the Frivolity (Oct/23/2006)
Charlie dates a woman whose personality is unbelievably similar to his mother's, and everyone sees it except Charlie.
Guest Stars: Katherine La Nasa as Lydia, James Edson as Bobby, Andy Pessoa as Andy, Brandon Killham as Joey
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3)
 
79 :04x07 - Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head (Nov/06/2006)
Charlie goes with Berta to help her confront the man who impregnated her daughter, who comes to the house to help Berta clean. Meanwhile, Alan has an unusual fetish.
Guest Stars: Treisa Gary as Nurse Shelby, Julianne Grossman as Darlene Wiedermeier, Andy MacKenzie as Ronald Wiedermeier, Sara Rue as Naomi
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Gary Halvorson, Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Jim Patterson
 
80 :04x08 - Release the Dogs (Nov/13/2006)
Alan has insomnia but refuses to take pills, opting for a visit to his psychiatrist, who reveals that the cause is Alan's jealously of Charlie and his ability to glide through life.
Guest Stars: Shane Woodson as Man, Stefan Umstead as Officer Foster, Bruno Amato as Officer Roberts, Larry Cedar as Policeman #1, John Pirruccello as Police Helicopter Pilot, Kelly King (1) as Kelly, Melanie Abramoff as Taylor, Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
81 :04x09 - Corey's Been Dead for an Hour (Nov/20/2006)
Alan's failure to ever pick up the check at dinner has Charlie at his wits end, especially after learning of his load of money he has stashed away.
Guest Stars: Kevin Knight as Cashier, Brendan Patrick Conner (1) as Middle-Aged Guy, Shon Little as Snack Bar Cashier, J. D. Walsh as Gordon, Rachel Cannon as Nina, Danielle Bisutti as Vicki, James Edson as Bobby
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
82 :04x10 - Kissing Abraham Lincoln (Nov/27/2006)
Charlie's latest lover takes over his house and pushes Berta's buttons by treating her like a maid, and he is too influenced by sex to stop her. Meanwhile, Alan's distracted from trying to get Kandi to agree to sell their condo after she asks him for sex.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, Katherine La Nasa as Lydia (1), Christopher T. Wood as Arnold, Carrie Stevens as Pam
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
83 :04x11 - Walnuts and Demerol (Dec/11/2006)
On Christmas Eve, Charlie's lusty plans for his date are thwarted by guests who keep stopping by, especially Evelyn, who is determined to keep them apart for some unexplained reason.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, Jessica Collins (1) as Gloria, Susan Sullivan as Dorothy, Ryan Stiles as Dr. Melnick
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson
 
84 :04x12 - Castrating Sheep in Montana (Jan/08/2007)
Charlie discovers that Alan has been secretly dating Berta's daughter and worries about how Berta will take the news, but he and Alan are taken by surprise by her uncharacteristic reaction.
Guest Stars: Marco Sanchez as Hector, Sara Rue as Naomi
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Mark Roberts (3)
 
85 :04x13 - Don't Worry, Speed Racer (Jan/22/2007)
Alan confronts Judith when Jake mentions that he hears his mom and Herb having sex; Charlie discovers that he's repressed his own memory involving his mom and a sexual partner.
Guest Stars: Melanie Lynskey as Rose, Sab Shimono as Hiroshi, Ryan Stiles as Herb Melnick
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
86 :04x14 - That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami (Feb/05/2007)
Charlie's new neighbor seems uncannily like Alan, which prompts Charlie to try and fix them up with the hope that they'll fall in love---and he'll get rid of Alan.
Guest Stars: Brooke Shields as Danielle, Deprise Brescia as Vanessa, Carly Thomas as Eva
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson
 
87 :04x15 - My Damn Stalker (Feb/12/2007)
When Rose announces she is moving to London, Charlie must face his true feelings for her. Meanwhile, Alan tries online dating with unforeseen results. Rose's heartfelt attempt to tell Charlie that she's leaving for good falls on deaf ears. Meanwhile, Alan fudges his profile on an Internet dating service, attracting a fellow profile embellisher.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Lauren Rose Lewis (1) as Shannon, Andrea Silvers as Sheri, Rebecca McFarland as Leanne, Allison Janney as Beverly
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
88 :04x16 - Young People Have Phlegm Too (Feb/19/2007)
Charlie becomes insecure about his age and wants to prove that he can still keep up with young people.
Guest Stars: Kris Iyer as Dr. Prajneep, Lamont Thompson as Bruno, Molly Morgan as Megan, Brooke D'Orsay as Robin, Morgan Fairchild as Donna
Director: Andrew D. Weyman
Story: Eddie Gorodetsky, Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
89 :04x17 - I Merely Slept with a Commie (Feb/26/2007)
When Evelyn expresses sympathy for a friend who had no mourners at her funeral, Alan and Charlie inform her that she's headed for the same fate. Instead of taking their comments as a motive to change, she cunningly makes them regret what they said.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Wayne Wilderson as Roger, Tony Tripoli as Phillip, Austin Lee as Changpu, Lee Garlington as Peggy
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1), Jim Patterson
 
90 :04x18 - It Never Rains in Hooterville (Mar/19/2007)
Realizing Jake's childhood is almost over, Alan makes a last minute attempt at father-son bonding.When Jake starts covering his walls with posters of sexy women, Alan feels pressure to make the most of what little childhood his son has left. Meanwhile, Kandi embarks on a new career as an actress.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Frankie Jay Allison as Rodney, Ben Hermes as Detective
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3)
 
91 :04x19 - Smooth as a Ken Doll (1) (Apr/09/2007)
As Judith's and Herb's wedding nears, Charlie gets close to Herb's witty sister.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Ryan Stiles as Herb, Judy Greer as Myra, Sara Erikson as Bethany
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 
92 :04x20 - Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot (2) (Apr/16/2007)
Alan prepares Jake for Judith's wedding, while Charlie continues his fling with Herb's sister.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Judy Greer as Myra, Ryan Stiles as Herb, Bob Rumnock (2) as Minister, Avner Garbi as Tailor, Deirdre Lovejoy as Shannon
Director: Jerry Zaks
Story: Eddie Gorodetsky, Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
93 :04x21 - Tucked, Taped & Gorgeous (Apr/23/2007)
Alan befriends Greg, a gay single dad, causing Alan and Charlie to re-examine their own sexual identities. Meanwhile, Jake has a crush on Greg's daughter, Sophie.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman, Kay Panabaker as Sophie, Matt Roth as Greg
Director: Jerry Zaks
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3)
 
94 :04x22 - Mr. McGlue's Feedbag (Apr/30/2007)
Jake comes into a windfall when Charlie takes him to the track, and Alan is stuck in that special hell known as the Department of Motor Vehicles.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Joel Murray as Petey, Andrea Savage as Lena, Doug Mitchell (1) as Jim
Director: Jon Cryer
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Jim Patterson
 
95 :04x23 - Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-lookin (May/07/2007)
Charlie loses a girl to a young, handsome handyman (Grammy Award winning recording artist Enrique Iglesias), who is working at his house.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Rachel Cannon as Chloe, Enrique Iglesias as Fernando
Director: Lee Aronsohn
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Jim Patterson, Don Foster (1)
 
96 :04x24 - Prostitutes and Gelato (May/14/2007)
Charlie and Alan must confront their "daddy issues" when Evelyn's new boyfriend invites them to Vegas on his private jet.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Robert Wagner as Teddy, Ian "Blaze" Kelly as Rapper, Mike Connors (1) as Hugo, Bob Rusch as Referee, Jacqueline Lord as Tiffany
Director: Ted Wass
Story: Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
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