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(Change Layout)Two and a Half Men  
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« Unknown Season   Settings    All Season (Printable Guide) Season 7 »
Unknown | S-1 | S-2 | S-3 | S-4 | S-5 | S-6 | S-7 | All

Season 1
1 :01x01 - Pilot (Sep/22/2003)
Charlie's life gets a little more complicated when his brother, Alan, and son, Jake, move in with him after his wife confesses her lesbian lifestyle and throws him out of the house. Alan later leaves after finding his son playing poker and moves in with his mother, Evelyn. Charlie realizes how lonely it is without them and invites them back.
Guest Stars: Louisette Geiss as Karen, Frankie Jay Allison as Rodney, Tom Wilson (1) as Mike, Eugene Byrd as Lenny, Don Foster (1) as Ken, Jennifer Taylor as Suzanne, Kristin Bower (1) as Lauren, Eddie Gorodetsky as Doug
Director: James Burrows (1)
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
2 :01x02 - Big Flappy Bastards (Sep/29/2003)
Charlie finds it hard to enforce the rules Alan has set out for his son. After Jake lures a flock of sea gulls into his room, Charlie gets very upset. Jake tries to get Charlie to forgive him. Alan starts doing chores and errands for Judith, trying to get them back together. After one of his tasks, she kisses him, leading him to believe that things will be back to normal.
Director: Andy Ackerman
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
3 :01x03 - Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell (Oct/06/2003)
After a trip to Disneyland, Jake gets sick and wants to go to Judith's house so she can take care of him. Alan gets saddened over this because he is losing his wife and son. Charlie takes him to a bar, and after drinking, they end up at their mother's house trying to tell her what they think of her, but not successful in the process.
Guest Stars: Darryl Sivad as Cab Driver
Director: Andy Ackerman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3)
 
4 :01x04 - If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song I'm Going to Take a Nap (Oct/13/2003)
Berta, the housekeeper, quits after experiencing Alan's demanding ways. Alan decides he could be the housekeeper, but does not work. Alan decides to hunt her down and bring her back, leaving Charlie to get ready for dinner with his mother and grandparents. Charlie also tries to get Rose to date other guys, both tasks become harder than expected.
Guest Stars: Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Steven Tyler as Himself
Director: Andy Ackerman
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
5 :01x05 - The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up With a Hump (Oct/20/2003)
After a trip to Las Vegas Charlie decides to go to Jake's soccer game like he promised. There, he meets a soccer mom and they hit it off. Alan goes to a meeting with some soccer moms about creating a newsletter, but does not realize they have other plans for the night.
Guest Stars: Liz Vassey as Kate, Christine Dunford as Gloria, Tricia O'Kelley as Brooke, Eric Allan Kramer as Bill
Director: Andy Ackerman
Writer: Eddie Gorodetsky
 
6 :01x06 - Did You Check With the Captain of the Flying Monkeys? (Oct/27/2003)
Charlie gets in over his head after he tells Jake to avoid certain calls he doesn't want which creates a dinner plan for Charlie and his mother. When Charlie meets her new boyfriend's daughter, he realizes it is one of the people he is trying to avoid.
Guest Stars: Madison Mason as Tommy Pearson, Krista Allen (1) as Olivia
Director: Andy Ackerman
Writer: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
7 :01x07 - If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake (Nov/03/2003)
For a class assignment, Jake draws the tattooed buttocks of one of Charlie's surfer friends, which in turn, worries his mother. Alan then starts to get worried about Judith when she becomes friends with the surfer girl.
Guest Stars: Kristin Dattilo as Cindy
Director: Andy Ackerman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3)
 
8 :01x08 - Twenty-Five Little Pre-pubers Without a Snoot-ful (Nov/10/2003)
Alan tricks Charlie in leading Jake and his classmates in the music show along with Alan and Judith.
Guest Stars: Rhyon Nicole Brown as Ashley, Katelin Petersen as Katie, Deena Dill as Miss Tuttle, Sam Lerner as Andrew, Jacob Urrutia as Luis, Abigail Mavity as Brianna
Director: Chuck Lorre
Writer: Eddie Gorodetsky
 
9 :01x09 - Phase One, Complete (Nov/17/2003)
Jake befriends one of Charlie's one-night stands, which Charlie does not like as it furthers the relationship that Charlie does not want to continue.
Guest Stars: Christopher Jacobs as Dave, Myndy Crist as Wendy
Director: Andy Ackerman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
10 :01x10 - Merry Thanksgiving (Nov/24/2003)
To try and prove to his girlfriend that he is a family man, Charlie invites Lisa over for Thanksgiving dinner at his house.
Guest Stars: Denise Richards as Lisa, George Wyner as Sheldon, Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Cristine Rose as Lenore
Director: Jay Sandrich
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
11 :01x11 - Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor (Dec/15/2003)
After bumping into Judith and her new boyfriend at the movies, Alan decides to change his look to try and get back into the dating scene, and to impress his son.
Guest Stars: Rebecca McFarland as Leanne, Lucky Vanous as Kevin, John Valdetero as Phil, Daniel R. Escobar as Richard
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3)
 
12 :01x12 - Camel Filters + Pheromones (Jan/05/2004)
Berta becomes forced to bring her granddaughter Prudence to work for a day. The boys like this because they get very preoccupied with her.
Guest Stars: Lisa Arning as Cheryl Ann, Megan Fox as Prudence, Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Noel Fisher as Freddie
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Mark Roberts (3), Susan Beavers
 
13 :01x13 - Sara Like Puny Alan (Jan/12/2004)
Charlie gets a double date with a hot neighbor and her sister and needs to take Alan along. The trouble is, Alan got sick from Jake so Charlie takes him to a steam room to heal him. It works for Alan, but Charlie becomes ill, but won't cancel the date at any cost.
Guest Stars: Lori Lively as Kathy, Johanna Black as Desiree Barrington
Director: Robert Berlinger
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Don Foster (1)
 
14 :01x14 - I Can't Afford Hyenas (Feb/02/2004)
Charlie's accountant Stan tries to explain Charlie's financial problems to him.
Guest Stars: Nick Toth as Football Announcer, J. D. Walsh as Ted, Elena Lyons as Susan, Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Richard Lewis (1) as Stan
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Writer: Jeff Abugov, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
15 :01x15 - Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick (1) (Feb/09/2004)
Charlie falls for a seemingly crazy woman named Franky against Alan's constant arguments about the woman.
Guest Stars: Juliette Goglia as Joanie, Jenna Elfman as Frankie
Director: Andrew D. Weyman
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
16 :01x16 - That Was Saliva, Alan (2) (Feb/16/2004)
Frankie tells Charlie and Alan why both her and her daughter are on the run, and Frankie's daughter gets a crush on Jake.
Guest Stars: Juliette Goglia as Joanie, Jenna Elfman as Frankie
Director: Andrew D. Weyman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
17 :01x17 - Ate The Hamburgers, Wearing The Hats (Feb/23/2004)
Charlie gets offended after Alan chooses harebrained cousins as Jake's legal guardians in the event of his death.
Guest Stars: Vernee Watson-Johnson as Nurse, Elise Robertson as Second Nurse, Ski Carr as Gonzales, Kris Iyer as Dr. Prajneep
Director: Andrew D. Weyman
Writer: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
18 :01x18 - An Old Flame With a New Wick (Mar/01/2004)
Charlie is stunned to find out that one of his ex-girlfriends had a sex change operation.
Guest Stars: Chris O'Donnell as Bill/Jill, Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Rebecca McFarland as Leanne
Director: Andrew D. Weyman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3)
 
19 :01x19 - I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You (Mar/22/2004)
At Jake's birthday party Judith's sister Liz hits on Alan while Evelyn prefers to drink alcohol than eat cake.
Guest Stars: Teri Hatcher as Liz
Director: Gail Mancuso
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre, Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
20 :01x20 - Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark (Apr/19/2004)
When Jake starts playing guitar non-stop, Judith thinks it is because he is having a hard time dealing with the divorce. She suggests that he sees a therapist, which Alan does not agree with at the beginning, but agrees later on.
Guest Stars: Amanda Tosch as Vicki, Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Jeff Abugov, Mark Roberts (3)
 
21 :01x21 - No Sniffing, No Wowing (May/03/2004)
Charlie puts Alan's divorce settlement into jeopardy when he sleeps with his attorney, Laura.
Guest Stars: Heather Locklear as Laura Lane, Alana De La Garza as Crystal, Marc Grapey as Stuart
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Writer: Don Foster (1), Chuck Lorre
 
22 :01x22 - My Doctor has a Cow Puppet (May/10/2004)
Charlie tries to cure Alan of his recent sleepwalking adventures; Jake goes and sees a therapist.
Guest Stars: Steffani Brass as Debbie, Jamie Day as Annette, Amanda Swisten as Darlene, Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman
Director: Gail Mancuso
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
23 :01x23 - Just Like Buffalo (May/17/2004)
Charlie tries to sweet talk Judith's support-group with other divorcees into letting Jake still spend weekends at his place.
Guest Stars: Stacey Travis as Linda, Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Amy Farrington as Kathleen, Yvette Nicole Brown as Mandy, Kristin Richardson as Tiffany, Cheryl White as Ruth
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Writer: Don Foster (1), Lee Aronsohn
 
24 :01x24 - Can You Feel My Finger? (May/24/2004)
Charlie heads to the doctor for a vasectomy after a recent pregnancy scare.
Guest Stars: Jenna Gering as Naomi, Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Byrne Offutt as Paul, Terry Rhoads as Dr. Andrew Sperlock
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 

Season 2
25 :02x01 - Back Off Mary Poppins (Sep/20/2004)
Alan finds out that Charlie is part of an exclusive men's group and begs his brother to be a part of it. The group contains Sean Penn, Elvis Costello, Harry Dean Stanton, and Bobby Cooper.
Guest Stars: Harry Dean Stanton as Himself, Elvis Costello as Himself, Bobby Cooper (5) as Himself, Sean Penn as Himself
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Susan Beavers
 
26 :02x02 - Enjoy Those Garlic Balls (Sep/27/2004)
Alan gets upset when he finds out Judith is dating Jake's pediatrician. Charlie points out, however, if she does marry him that Alan's alimony payments will end.
Guest Stars: Ryan Stiles as Dr. Melnick
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
27 :02x03 - A Bag Full of Jawea (Oct/04/2004)
Jake is on the verge of getting suspended from school when he gives his teacher Miss Pyle the finger. Charlie tries to save Jake from the suspension by dating her, but fails several times.
Guest Stars: Missi Pyle as Delores Pasternak
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Jeff Abugov, Mark Roberts (3)
 
28 :02x04 - Go Get Mommy's Bra (Oct/11/2004)
Jake loves his mother's new boyfriend, Dr. Melnick, and won't stop talking about him, which bugs Alan. Evelyn borrows Charlie's car to impress a Saudi prince, so she can sell him real estate. When Charlie gets his car back, his mother's bra is found in the backseat. After he finds out why it is there, he trades it in.
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Eddie Gorodetsky, Chuck Lorre
 
29 :02x05 - Bad News from the Clinic (Oct/18/2004)
Charlie meets somebody who can play hard to get better than he does, which makes him want her even more.
Guest Stars: Jeri Ryan as Sherri, James Edson as Stephan
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Jeff Abugov, Mark Roberts (3)
 
30 :02x06 - The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance (Oct/25/2004)
Alan denies ever shoplifting a toy as a child and fears that he he might have a dark side to him. Charlie admits that he planted it so he wouldn't get in trouble from their mom.
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
31 :02x07 - A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana (Nov/08/2004)
Charlie and Alan hire Berta's sister to help set up and cater a party that their mother had talked them into throwing her.
Guest Stars: Camryn Manheim as Daisy Ray
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
32 :02x08 - Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers (Nov/15/2004)
Alan meets the girl of his dreams in Nancy, who fulfills all of his desires which forces Charlie to take care of Jake. Trouble stirs a few days later when Alan decides he wants to marry her.
Guest Stars: Kelley West as Nancy
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
33 :02x09 - Yes, Monsignor (Nov/22/2004)
Charlie leaves a date he can't stand and ends up at a coffee shop where he runs into his ex-girlfriend, Lisa. She has broken up with her husband and left with a child. He tries to convince her that he's okay with her having a child. Jake tries to reason with his father why he isn't doing too well in school.
Guest Stars: Sam Sheen as Lisa's Daughter, Denise Richards as Lisa
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Jeff Abugov, Susan Beavers
 
34 :02x10 - The Salmon Under My Sweater (Nov/29/2004)
Jake helps Charlie come up with the theme song for a children's television show which is based on one of Jake's favorite comic books. Alan finds out how smart and fun Rose is when he starts spending more time with her.
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
35 :02x11 - Last Chance to See Those Tattoos (Dec/13/2004)
Charlie finds out about a website created by him that shows how evil he is to women. Charlie goes and tries to find out who made the site by apologizing to all of them. He finds it hard to track down the creator when all the women take the apology a lot better than he expects.
Guest Stars: Jennifer Taylor as Tina, Ana Alexander as Montage Doctor, Julie Dickens as Montage Beautiful Woman, Jodi Lyn O'Keefe as Gail
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
36 :02x12 - A Lungful of Alan (Jan/03/2005)
Alan gets jealous when an old classmate who grew up to be a beautiful woman seems more interested in dating Charlie then himself.
Guest Stars: Paget Brewster as Jamie Eckelberry
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Eddie Gorodetsky, Mark Roberts (3)
 
37 :02x13 - Zejdz z Moich Wlosów a.k.a. Get Off My Hair (Jan/17/2005)
Judith's house (actually Alan's of course) gets damaged during an earthquake and needs a place to stay. Alan offers Charlie's house without his permission. Charlie agrees, although not happy at first. Alan gets jealous when she goes on a date and has Charlie find him one to show her he can date just like anyone else.
Guest Stars: Nicole Forester as Camille, Magdalena Zielinska as Inga
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
38 :02x14 - Those Big Pink Things with Coconut (Jan/31/2005)
After insulting the way Alan raises Jake, Alan and Charlie throw Evelyn out of the house. After ignoring her numerous phone calls, she feigns an emergency at the hospital which Aland and Charlie believe at first, until they catch her bluff.
Guest Stars: Bob Morrisey as Dr. Little, Brian George (2) as TV Narrator
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Don Foster (1), Jeff Abugov
 
39 :02x15 - Smell the Umbrella Stand (Feb/07/2005)
Alan gets worried about a minor medical procedure he is going to face, so Charlie decides to take him to Vegas to get his mind off it.
Guest Stars: Suzanne Whang as Anesthesiologist, Mark Chaet as Doctor
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 
40 :02x16 - Can You Eat Human Flesh With Wooden Teeth? (Feb/14/2005)
Alan and Charlie have to take care of Jake the whole week while Judith takes a vacation, which proves harder then they imagined.
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
41 :02x17 - Woo-Hoo, A Hernia-Exam! (Feb/21/2005)
Alan takes Charlie to the hospital where he hits on a doctor he didn't know he had past history with. Berta is fed up with the way Jake uses the bathroom so she makes him clean it until he learns.
Guest Stars: Alicia Coppola as Dr. Michelle Talmadge, Kristen Miller (1) as Debbie, Helen Greenberg (1) as Nurse, Ken Jeong as Male Nurse
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
42 :02x18 - It Was Mame, Mom (Mar/07/2005)
Charlie is invited to a party hosted by a gay ad-executive named Eric and he takes Alan pretending they are life partners. While there, Charlie meets Eric's ex-wife Pamela, and tries to get with her without Eric knowing.
Guest Stars: Nick Toth as TV Narrator, Lucy Lawless as Pamela, David Starzyk as Eric, Dayna Devon (1) as Women in Store
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Eddie Gorodetsky, Mark Roberts (3)
 
43 :02x19 - A Low, Gutteral Tongue-Flapping Noise (Mar/21/2005)
After Charlie takes Alan to the eye doctor they end up at a cafe where they both bump into Charlie's ex-girlfriend, Sherri. Alan deicdes to ask her out after showing interest, but he can't get over the relationship she had with Charlie.
Guest Stars: James Edson as Stephan, Jeri Ryan as Sherri
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
44 :02x20 - I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey (Apr/18/2005)
When Charlie and Alan take their personal frustrations out on each other, Rose buts in the middle to try and help them out.
Guest Stars: Daniel Sheldon as Little Alan, Dylan Minnette as Little Charlie
Director: Asaad Kelada
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
45 :02x21 - A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On (May/02/2005)
Evelyn reads that her second husband Harry had died. They all attend the funeral. Jake is excited to see a "dead guy" while Charlie is excited about the opportunity of a newly single widow, and Alan is glad he can pay his respects to Harry.
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
46 :02x22 - That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother (May/09/2005)
Evelyn buys Alan a new sports car if he goes on a double date with her, her new boyfriend and his daughter. Alan finds out that his mother and her boyfriend can't make it, leaving the two of them alone, when Alan finds out she has a few loose screws and she ends up stealing his new car, and ending up on a televised high-speed car chase.
Guest Stars: Chloe Webb as Trudy
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3)
 
47 :02x23 - Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab (May/16/2005)
After learning that Jake spent his whole Spring Break at his other grandparents, Evelyn pressures Alan to have Jack spend more time with her. Alan is worried she will screw him up, like she did to him and Charlie. He agrees, though, and drops him off at her house. Alan meets a sexy woman at Charlie's favorite bar, which easily gets his mind off his son's bad time.
Guest Stars: Catherine McCord as Danielle, Christina Chambers as Kimberly, | Uncredited: Valerie Azlynn as Dancing Volleyball Girl
Director: J. D. Lobue (1)
Writer: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
48 :02x24 - Does This Smell Funny to You? (May/23/2005)
Jake must read what he did over the weekend as an essay to the class. The weekend consists of Charlie unknowingly sleeping with an elderly man's trophy wife over the weekend.
Guest Stars: Orson Bean as Norman, Karen Trella as Natalie, Patricia Bethune as Teacher
Director: Pamela Fryman
Writer: Jeff Abugov, Susan Beavers
 

Season 3
49 :03x01 - Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts (Sep/19/2005)
After Alan falls off a ladder, Charlie ends up watching over him and Jake, which proves to be a harder task than he thought.
Guest Stars: Kim Oja as Betsy
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
50 :03x02 - Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover (Sep/26/2005)
Jake gets suspended from school after he draws a picture of a girl in his class with huge breasts. Charlie is asked to watch over Alan's chiropractic office after pulling an all-nighter, while telling Charlie not to do anything but answer the phone. Charlie turns the place into a get rich quick scheme.
Guest Stars: Lincoln Kennedy as Mr. Dunlop, Stephanie Erb as Mrs. Schmidt, Bill Rutkoski as Lenny, Candace Kita (2) as Coco, Anna Pheil as Tanya, Wayne Thomas Yorke (1) as Bob, Diane Sellers as Ms. Gallagher
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
51 :03x03 - Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark (Oct/03/2005)
Charlie finds out that Alan has been seeing his ex-wife, which is the reason he hasn't been dating. Alan tells Charlie not to tell Jake because he doesn't want him to get his hopes up. Judith and Alan spend a day together at the house, but Jake keeps interrupting when they try to get sensual in the hot-tub. When they take it to the bedroom, Alan screws everything up for himself.
Guest Stars: Mandy Bentley as Sexy Girl, Sandy Bentley as Sexy Girl
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Don Foster (1), Lee Aronsohn
 
52 :03x04 - Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs (Oct/10/2005)
Berta moves in with Charlie which causes Alan and Jake to move out when she starts butting in to things.
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
53 :03x05 - We Called It Mr. Pinky (Oct/17/2005)
Charlie figures out his commitment issues are because of his unresolved issues with his mother. Jake asks Charlie advice about a girl he likes at school.
Guest Stars: Natalie Zea as Colleen
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Mark Roberts (3), Susan Beavers
 
54 :03x06 - Hi, Mr. Horned One (Oct/24/2005)
Alan dislikes Isabella, Charlie's latest flame. Their rocky start spirals into suspicion of satanic rituals before an unexpeced turn of events scare Isabella off.
Guest Stars: Jodi Lyn O'Keefe as Isabella
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
Story: Eddie Gorodetsky
 
55 :03x07 - Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop (Nov/07/2005)
Charlie wakes up with Rose the morning after her birthday party. Her father (guest star and father of Charlie Sheen, Martin Sheen) comes to find out what Charlie plans for their future. But what happens when Evelyn shows up is very strange.
Guest Stars: June Squibb as Margaret, Martin Sheen as Harvey
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
56 :03x08 - That Voodoo That I Do Do (Nov/14/2005)
Charlie cons Jake into taking ballet lessons in order to get close to the teacher.

After his romantic overtures toward an attractive ballet teacher, Mia, are rejected, Charlie will stop at nothing to prove to Alan that he can persuade her to go out on a date with him. When he talks a reluctant Jake into taking her dance class to help his cause, his plan is derailed when Jake falls for her, too.
Guest Stars: Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia
Director: Gary Halvorson
Writer: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
57 :03x09 - Madame and Her Special Friend (Nov/21/2005)
Alan strikes up a friendship with Charlie's wealthy and amorous neighbor, Norma, only to find himself on the defensive as she puts on a full-court press to win his affections. Meanwhile, Charlie tries to dissuade Jake from donating money to a televangelist.
Guest Stars: Phil Abrams as Hector, April Bowlby as Kim, Cloris Leachman as Norma, James Edson as Stephan (Bobby) Wasserstein
Director: Asaad Kelada
Writer: Lee Aronsohn
 
58 :03x10 - Something Salted and Twisted (Nov/28/2005)
Charlie helps Alan cope with his lifelong obsession to get women's approval.

Alan organizes a family dinner to celebrate the publication of a newspaper article that calls him a "good doctor, good neighbor and a good guy," but he's crushed when his mother, Evelyn, isn't impressed. After drowning his sorrow in many drinks, he has a life-changing epiphany and vows to a skeptical Charlie that he is no longer going to grovel for validation from his mother and the other women in his life.

* This episode was previously titled "Castration and Scallops"
Guest Stars: Rebecca McFarland as Leanne, Jennifer Ann Massey (3) as Sheila, Aja Evans as Emily
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
Story: Eddie Gorodetsky
 
59 :03x11 - Santa's Village of the Damned (Dec/19/2005)
Just in time for Christmas, Alan falls for Sandy, the teacher of his cooking class, and before long, she moves into the house, fattens the guys up with gourmet meals, drives Berta crazy with housekeeping tips, and generally turns all of their lives upside down with her unnatural pursuit of perfection. Charlie warns Alan that she's a "nester" and needs to be stopped before they reach a point of no return. Sandy turns out to be crazy for Santa.
Guest Stars: Josie Davis as Sandy
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Writer: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
60 :03x12 - That Special Tug (Jan/09/2006)
Charlie and Alan drop Jake off at a friend's house and head out for some sibling bonding at the movies, but their night is ruined when Alan freaks out after convincing himself that Jake was too eager to spend the weekend away from him. Recognizing that desperate times call for desperate measures, Charlie begins seeing a therapist, ostensibly to learn how to cope with his brother's ever-increasing emotional instability.
Guest Stars: Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman, Andrea Bendewald as Terry Sholander, Kelley West as Amy, Valerie Azlynn as Beth
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Story: Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn
 
61 :03x13 - Humiliation is a Visual Medium (Jan/23/2006)
No one believes Charlie when he says that his relationship with Mia is getting serious, and everyone really thinks he's lost it when he confesses that they have been dating for more than a month and haven't consummated the relationship. After a continuing series of chaste dates -- walking on the beach, visiting an art gallery, going bowling -- that end with Charlie frustrated at Mia's doorstep, he makes a proposal that threatens their burgeoning romance.
Guest Stars: Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia, April Bowlby as Kimber
Director: Rob Schiller (2)
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
62 :03x14 - Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded (Feb/06/2006)
Charlie plans a romantic date with Mia in the hopes of finally consummating their relationship, but his path to the promised land is blocked when she finds out that he hasn't told his former paramours that he's in a committed relationship. Meanwhile, Alan starts dating Kandi, Charlie's most recent ex-girlfriend, who is half his age.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
63 :03x15 - My Tongue is Meat (Feb/27/2006)
Charlie can't keep pace with the healthy lifestyle that Mia has introduced to their relationship, so he sneaks cigars and beers in the garage and enlists Rose to deliver burgers to him on the sly. When Mia busts him for lying, Charlie has to figure out if he's just whipped or truly in love.
Guest Stars: Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia, J. D. Walsh as Gordon, Jackie Debatin as Ginger
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
64 :03x16 - Ergo, The Booty Call (Mar/06/2006)
Alan is having second thoughts about whether he should be dating a woman half his age and is mortified at the idea of introducing Kandi to Evelyn at Jake's birthday party. Meanwhile, Rose continues her passive-aggressive pursuit of Charlie by changing her boyfriend to look almost like an exact copy.
Guest Stars: Susse Budde as Willow, Alitzah as Ellie, Brian Thomas Smith (4) as Emmett, Hugh Holub as Man #1, J. D. Walsh as Gordon, April Bowlby as Kandi
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 
65 :03x17 - The Unfortunate Little Schnauser (Mar/13/2006)
Charlie boycotts an advertising awards banquet, having lost several years in a row to his cocky competitor, Archie. After devising a ploy to get him to attend, Alan, Evelyn and Jake accompany Charlie for support -- until they get to know Archie. Meanwhile, Rose talks Charlie into giving relationship advice to her new beau, Gordon.
Guest Stars: Loren Lester as Emcee, Jon Lovitz as Archie, J. D. Walsh as Gordon
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
66 :03x18 - The Spit-Covered Cobbler (Mar/20/2006)
When Kandi's old car breaks down, Alan ends up leasing her a new one. Charlie warns him to break things off with her, but when Alan spends his last dime on Kandi's root canal and can't pay Judith's alimony, Charlie is forced to cover for him.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, John Mendoza (1) as Sid
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
67 :03x19 - Golly Moses, She's A Muffin (Apr/10/2006)
Charlie's not happy when he learns that Kandi has been living in sin with Alan in his house -- particularly since he himself has been having a dry spell with women. Things begin to look up for Charlie when Judith befriends Kandi, and a special visitor comes knocking on his door.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, Gail O'Grady as Mandi, Diane Delano as Prison Matron
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
68 :03x20 - Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro (Apr/24/2006)
Alan is depressed that his hot young girlfriend, Kandi, has left him to go stay with his bitter ex-wife, Judith, who has brainwashed her against him. At the advice of Mandi, Kandi's mother, Alan goes to Judith's to try to win her back. Meanwhile, Kandi has set Judith up on a date with Andy, her father.
Guest Stars: Kevin Sorbo as Andy, Gail O'Grady as Mandi, April Bowlby as Kandi
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
69 :03x21 - And the Plot Moistens (May/01/2006)
Jake's teacher, Francine, calls in Alan and Judith to discuss Jake's lack of interest in school. Desperate to communicate with someone intelligent while continuing to see his air-headed girlfriend, Kandi, Alan falls for Francine -- in a platonic way. Meanwhile, Charlie helps Jake prepare his audition song for the school musical, which he was forced to try out for by Alan and Judith.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, Julia Campbell (1) as Francine
Director: Jerry Zaks
Story: Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre, Mark Roberts (3)
 
70 :03x22 - Just Once With Aunt Sophie (May/08/2006)
When a cute girl from Jake's school invites him to a party, Charlie butts in on Alan's milestone moment with his son by offering his own words of wisdom on women. While Alan feels somewhat jealous that Charlie is taking over, he realizes that he also feels envious that his son is receiving some solid advice on scoring with women that he wishes his brother had once taught him.
Guest Stars: Ralph Cole, Jr. as Ricky, Stephanie Brown as Connie
Director: Lee Aronsohn
Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
71 :03x23 - Arguments for the Quickie (May/15/2006)
When Charlie finds out that Mia is in town with her dance troupe and has invited him to her performance, he opts not to go and tries to convince Alan (and himself) that he's over her. After surprising Alan (and himself) by showing up, Charlie gets another surprise when Mia explains that she wants something personal from him -- his sperm. Shockingly, commitment-phobic Charlie responds by asking Mia for something as well.
Guest Stars: Art Bonilla as Angry Man (O.S.), Raymond Ma as Mr. Park, Irena A. Hoffman (1) as Fawn, Maria Tornberg as Theresa, Cheyenne Casebier as Jennifer, April Bowlby as Kandi, Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
72 :03x24 - That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite (May/22/2006)
Wedding bells loom as Charlie and Mia make wedding arrangements. But when their families meet, things immediately begin to fall apart. Rose takes the news of the engagement hard, and makes some interesting plans of her own. Additionally, there are questions as to where Alan and Jake will live after Charlie and Mia get married. Ultimately, Charlie and his bride-to-be end up deciding on a small ceremony in Vegas, where a wedding ultimately ensues.
Guest Stars: Steven Shaw as Reverend Yarnell, John Vance as Leon, April Bowlby as Kandi, Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 

Season 4
73 :04x01 - Working for Caligula (Sep/18/2006)
Alan wins $500,000 but then finds out Kandi does not love him. A month later Alan is back living with Charlie, who has gone back to the bachelor life. Now, Alan feels he is an all time failure, and no one can cheer him up.
Guest Stars: Melanie Lynskey as Rose, Katie Weaver as Marie, Mia Kelly (1) as Cindy, Sandra McCoy as Tina, Marisa Tayui as Sally
Director: Gary Halvorson
Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
74 :04x02 - Who's Vod Kanockers (Sep/25/2006)
Alan feels guilty when he learns that Charlie and Mia didn't tie the knot because she had wanted him and Jake to move out. Meanwhile, Charlie and his rock star neighbor don't get along.
Guest Stars: Steven Tyler as Himself, Natalie Denise Sperl as Janie
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 
75 :04x03 - The Sea is a Harsh Mistress (Oct/02/2006)
Charlie attempts to surf in order to impress a beautiful girl -- with disastrous results. He later tells Alan that when his life was hanging in the balance, their deceased father came to him and made a request that Charlie's loath to fulfill.
Guest Stars: Sami Reed as Dottie, Brian Patrick Wade (1) as Sam, Robert Clotworthy as (Gangter boss)
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Mark Roberts (3), Lee Aronsohn
 
76 :04x04 - A Pot Smoking Monkey (Oct/09/2006)
Alan is determined to gain custody of his and Kandi's dog after she walks away from their split with both the condo and the car. Having also lost everything to Judith following their divorce, Alan decides to hire the best lawyer he knows -- hers.
Guest Stars: Michael Patrick McGill as Officer #2, Andre Ware as Officer #1, Christopher Neiman as Joel
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Bill Prady, Maria Espada Pearce | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
77 :04x05 - A Live Woman of Proven Fertility (Oct/16/2006)
When Judith announces she's remarrying, Charlie and Alan find themselves helping her fiancé get over his cold feet so that Alan will finally be free from paying alimony.
Guest Stars: Ryan Stiles as Herb, Ireesha as Woman
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
78 :04x06 - Apologies for the Frivolity (Oct/23/2006)
Charlie dates a woman whose personality is unbelievably similar to his mother's, and everyone sees it except Charlie.
Guest Stars: Katherine La Nasa as Lydia, James Edson as Bobby, Andy Pessoa as Andy, Brandon Killham as Joey
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3)
 
79 :04x07 - Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head (Nov/06/2006)
Charlie goes with Berta to help her confront the man who impregnated her daughter, who comes to the house to help Berta clean. Meanwhile, Alan has an unusual fetish.
Guest Stars: Treisa Gary as Nurse Shelby, Julianne Grossman as Darlene Wiedermeier, Andy MacKenzie as Ronald Wiedermeier, Sara Rue as Naomi
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Gary Halvorson, Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
80 :04x08 - Release the Dogs (Nov/13/2006)
Alan has insomnia but refuses to take pills, opting for a visit to his psychiatrist, who reveals that the cause is Alan's jealously of Charlie and his ability to glide through life.
Guest Stars: Shane Woodson as Man, Stefan Umstead as Officer Foster, Bruno Amato as Officer Roberts, Larry Cedar as Policeman #1, John Pirruccello as Police Helicopter Pilot, Kelly King (1) as Kelly, Melanie Abramoff as Taylor, Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
81 :04x09 - Corey's Been Dead for an Hour (Nov/20/2006)
Alan's failure to ever pick up the check at dinner has Charlie at his wits end, especially after learning of his load of money he has stashed away.
Guest Stars: Kevin Knight as Cashier, Brendan Patrick Conner (1) as Middle-Aged Guy, Shon Little as Snack Bar Cashier, J. D. Walsh as Gordon, Rachel Cannon as Nina, Danielle Bisutti as Vicki, James Edson as Bobby
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
82 :04x10 - Kissing Abraham Lincoln (Nov/27/2006)
Charlie's latest lover takes over his house and pushes Berta's buttons by treating her like a maid, and he is too influenced by sex to stop her. Meanwhile, Alan's distracted from trying to get Kandi to agree to sell their condo after she asks him for sex.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, Katherine La Nasa as Lydia (1), Christopher T. Wood as Arnold, Carrie Stevens as Pam
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
83 :04x11 - Walnuts and Demerol (Dec/11/2006)
On Christmas Eve, Charlie's lusty plans for his date are thwarted by guests who keep stopping by, especially Evelyn, who is determined to keep them apart for some unexplained reason.
Guest Stars: April Bowlby as Kandi, Jessica Collins (1) as Gloria, Susan Sullivan as Dorothy, Ryan Stiles as Dr. Melnick
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson
 
84 :04x12 - Castrating Sheep in Montana (Jan/08/2007)
Charlie discovers that Alan has been secretly dating Berta's daughter and worries about how Berta will take the news, but he and Alan are taken by surprise by her uncharacteristic reaction.
Guest Stars: Marco Sanchez as Hector, Sara Rue as Naomi
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Mark Roberts (3)
 
85 :04x13 - Don't Worry, Speed Racer (Jan/22/2007)
Alan confronts Judith when Jake mentions that he hears his mom and Herb having sex; Charlie discovers that he's repressed his own memory involving his mom and a sexual partner.
Guest Stars: Melanie Lynskey as Rose, Ryan Stiles as Herb Melnick, Sab Shimono as Hiroshi
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Susan Beavers, Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
86 :04x14 - That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami (Feb/05/2007)
Charlie's new neighbor seems uncannily like Alan, which prompts Charlie to try and fix them up with the hope that they'll fall in love---and he'll get rid of Alan.
Guest Stars: Carly Thomas as Eva, Deprise Brescia as Vanessa, Brooke Shields as Danielle
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1), Jim Patterson
 
87 :04x15 - My Damn Stalker (Feb/12/2007)
When Rose announces she is moving to London, Charlie must face his true feelings for her. Meanwhile, Alan tries online dating with unforeseen results. Rose's heartfelt attempt to tell Charlie that she's leaving for good falls on deaf ears. Meanwhile, Alan fudges his profile on an Internet dating service, attracting a fellow profile embellisher.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Allison Janney as Beverly, Rebecca McFarland as Leanne, Andrea Silvers as Sheri, Lauren Rose Lewis (1) as Shannon
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
88 :04x16 - Young People Have Phlegm Too (Feb/19/2007)
Charlie becomes insecure about his age and wants to prove that he can still keep up with young people.
Guest Stars: Kris Iyer as Dr. Prajneep, Lamont Thompson as Bruno, Molly Morgan as Megan, Brooke D'Orsay as Robin, Morgan Fairchild as Donna
Director: Andrew D. Weyman
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
89 :04x17 - I Merely Slept with a Commie (Feb/26/2007)
When Evelyn expresses sympathy for a friend who had no mourners at her funeral, Alan and Charlie inform her that she's headed for the same fate. Instead of taking their comments as a motive to change, she cunningly makes them regret what they said.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Wayne Wilderson as Roger, Tony Tripoli as Phillip, Austin Lee as Changpu, Lee Garlington as Peggy
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
90 :04x18 - It Never Rains in Hooterville (Mar/19/2007)
Realizing Jake's childhood is almost over, Alan makes a last minute attempt at father-son bonding.When Jake starts covering his walls with posters of sexy women, Alan feels pressure to make the most of what little childhood his son has left. Meanwhile, Kandi embarks on a new career as an actress.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Frankie Jay Allison as Rodney, Ben Hermes as Detective
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Don Foster (1)
 
91 :04x19 - Smooth as a Ken Doll (1) (Apr/09/2007)
As Judith's and Herb's wedding nears, Charlie gets close to Herb's witty sister.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Sara Erikson as Bethany, Judy Greer as Myra, Ryan Stiles as Herb
Director: Gary Halvorson
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 
92 :04x20 - Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot (2) (Apr/16/2007)
Alan prepares Jake for Judith's wedding, while Charlie continues his fling with Herb's sister.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Deirdre Lovejoy as Shannon, Avner Garbi as Tailor, Bob Rumnock (2) as Minister, Ryan Stiles as Herb, Judy Greer as Myra
Director: Jerry Zaks
Story: Jim Patterson, Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
93 :04x21 - Tucked, Taped & Gorgeous (Apr/23/2007)
Alan befriends Greg, a gay single dad, causing Alan and Charlie to re-examine their own sexual identities. Meanwhile, Jake has a crush on Greg's daughter, Sophie.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman, Kay Panabaker as Sophie, Matt Roth as Greg
Director: Jerry Zaks
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Don Foster (1)
 
94 :04x22 - Mr. McGlue's Feedbag (Apr/30/2007)
Jake comes into a windfall when Charlie takes him to the track, and Alan is stuck in that special hell known as the Department of Motor Vehicles.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Doug Mitchell (1) as Jim, Andrea Savage as Lena, Joel Murray as Petey
Director: Jon Cryer
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Don Foster (1)
 
95 :04x23 - Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-lookin (May/07/2007)
Charlie loses a girl to a young, handsome handyman (Grammy Award winning recording artist Enrique Iglesias), who is working at his house.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Rachel Cannon as Chloe, Enrique Iglesias as Fernando
Director: Lee Aronsohn
Writer: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Jim Patterson, Don Foster (1)
 
96 :04x24 - Prostitutes and Gelato (May/14/2007)
Charlie and Alan must confront their "daddy issues" when Evelyn's new boyfriend invites them to Vegas on his private jet.


Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Robert Wagner as Teddy, Ian "Blaze" Kelly as Rapper, Mike Connors (1) as Hugo, Bob Rusch as Referee, Jacqueline Lord as Tiffany
Director: Ted Wass
Story: Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Eddie Gorodetsky
 

Season 5
97 :05x01 - Large Birds, Spiders and Mom (Sep/24/2007)
Charlie and Alan try to get Jake ready for his first day of junior high, but end up doing more harm than good.
Guest Stars: Monica Young as Julie, Brian Turk as Mike, Kris Iyer as Dr. Pranjeep
Director: Ted Wass
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
98 :05x02 - Media Room Slash Dungeon (Oct/01/2007)
Both Charlie and Alan have odd reactions to their respective nights -- Charlie spends an evening with his mother and Alan is given a weird response after having sex with his date.
Guest Stars: Janeane Garofalo as Sharon, Jennifer O'Dell as Margaret, Holly King as Mitzi, Michael Potter as Man's Voice
Director: Ted Wass
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1)
 
99 :05x03 - Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo (Oct/08/2007)
After going out with too many bimbos, Charlie lets Alan set him up with a woman his own age.
Guest Stars: Ming-Na as Linda Harris, Paige Peterson as Hooker, Kurt Scholler as Bailiff, J. J. Rodgers (2) as Luanne, Kimberly Quinn as Donna, Jud Tylor as Deedee
Director: Ted Wass
Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
100 :05x04 - City of Great Racks (Oct/15/2007)
Charlie nearly consummates his relationship with Linda, but when he sees Rose's face everywhere, he's unable to.
Special Guest Stars: Melanie Lynskey as Rose, | Guest Stars: Ming-Na as Linda Harris, Anna Graves as Flight Attendant, Jane Lynch as Dr. Freeman
Director: James Widdoes
Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Mark Roberts (3), Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1), Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
Songs: Bianca Ryan -- The Rose
 
101 :05x05 - Putting Swim Fins on a Cat (Oct/22/2007)
Alan discovers that Charlie hasn't had a paid gig for months and finds way to cut back on the expenses and earn a bit of extra cash. Charlie meets Linda's son and ends up spending a day with him.
Guest Stars: Michael Kelly (1) as Brandon Elijah, Ernie Grunwald as Clinician, Matt McKenzie (1) as Gary, Ming-Na as Linda Harris
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1)
 
102 :05x06 - Help Daddy Find His Toenail (Oct/29/2007)
Charlie is annoyed when his girlfriend is embarassed to be around him in public. Meanwhile, Jake sneaks out to go to a concert despite Alan forbidding him to do so.
Guest Stars: Ming-Na as Linda Harris, Jeanine Giovanni as Melina, Richard V. Licata as Councilman Stewart
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Susan Beavers
 
103 :05x07 - The Leather Gear Is In The Guest Room (Nov/05/2007)
Charlie and Alan fight over Alan's place in the household, leading Alan and Jake to move in to Evelyn's.
Guest Stars: Robert Wagner as Teddy, Simone Kessell as Nina
Director: Ted Wass
Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
104 :05x08 - Is There a Mrs. Waffles? (Nov/12/2007)
Charlie discovers he may have a new career as a children's singing star.
Guest Stars: Gregg Marx as Announcer, Kate Luyben as Woman, Lexi Jourden as Dakota, Tina Morasco as Summer, Ion Overman as Vicki, Richard Kind as Artie
Director: Ted Wass
Story: Jim Patterson, Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
105 :05x09 - Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids (Nov/19/2007)
Charlie must fight his new found attraction to Teddy's daughter.
Guest Stars: Robert Wagner as Teddy, Jenny McCarthy as Courtney
Director: Jean Sagal
Story: Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1)
 
106 :05x10 - Kinda Like Necrophilia (Nov/26/2007)
Alan sets out to get Charlie back when he learns that Charlie stole his high school girlfriend from him.
Guest Stars: Laura McLauchlin as Charity, Justine Eyre as Gabrielle
Director: Ted Wass
Story: Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
107 :05x11 - Meander To Your Dander (Mar/17/2008)
Charlie teaches Alan the finer points on breaking up with a female.
Guest Stars: Kimberly Quinn as Donna, Eve Gordon as Brenda, Sandra Robinson as Georgia, Gracie Maddox as Lilly
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Don Foster (1) | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson
 
108 :05x12 - A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh (Mar/24/2008)
A sick Charlie receives unique nursing from Rose, as she returns from England.
Guest Stars: Sun Park as Manicurist, Cerina Vincent as Lulu, Melanie Lynskey as Rose
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
109 :05x13 - The Soil is Moist (Mar/31/2008)
Alan goes on a date with an old friend of Judith's, who spends the night gossiping about Judith's past sex life.
Guest Stars: Ryan Stiles as Herb, Christina Moore (1) as Cynthia Sullivan, Jessica Tuck as Cynthia
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 
110 :05x14 - Winky-Dink Time (Apr/14/2008)
As Charlie and Jake set up a double date, Charlie arranges for Alan to accompany a prostitute on his date.
Guest Stars: Jamison Haase (1) as Waiter, Carrie Reichenbach as Alexis, Hayley Erin as Milly, Kathryn Gordon (1) as Jess
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Jim Patterson
 
111 :05x15 - Rough Night in Hump Junction (Apr/21/2008)
Alan fears that Charlie's womanizing has gone too far.
Guest Stars: Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia, Jane Lynch as Dr. Freeman, Jen Lilley as Bridesmaid #4, Jennifer Keyes as Bridesmaid #3, Keena Ferguson as Bridesmaid #2, Mikki Padilla as Bridesmaid #1, Alison Shanks as Woman, Clint Carmichael as Fred, Barry Livingston as Sam, Andrea Bogart as Gretchen, Anastasia Roark as Pepper
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
112 :05x16 - Look at Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty (Apr/28/2008)
Alan plans Evelyn's wedding while Charlie pursues his future step-sister.

Source: CBS
Special Guest Stars: Robert Wagner as Teddy, | Guest Stars: Jenny McCarthy as Courtney, Steve Tom as Minister, Melanie Lynskey as Rose
Director: Joel Zwick
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers
 
113 :05x17 - Fish in a Drawer (May/05/2008)
This is a CSI and Two & A Half Men crossover episode whereas the writers of CSI wrote this episode and the writers of Two & a Half Men wrote there half hour portion of the episode which airs in CSI time slot.

Grissom and the CSI team become involved in the world of Hollywood comedy when a diva sitcom star meets an untimely demise while filming her show in Las Vegas.

Source: CBS
Special Guest Stars: George Eads as George, | Guest Stars: Carrie Reichenbach as Alexis, Nakia Syvonne as Angel, Nicole Sullivan as Misty, John Burke (1) as Detective Henry Ketchum, Jamie Rose as Sloane Jagov, Jenny McCarthy as Courtney, Robert Wagner as Teddy, Hollie Stenson as Destinee, | Co-Guest Stars: Dan Cole (1) as Clown, Hope Allen as Jenna, Brett Wagner as Cell Mate, Ping Wu as Coroner
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Naren Shankar, Carol Mendelsohn | Teleplay: Evan Dunsky, Sarah Goldfinger
 
114 :05x18 - If My Hole Could Talk (May/12/2008)
Charlie finds himself drawn to an older author of self help books, while Alan and Jake are fighting over a assignment for school.
Guest Stars: Susan Blakely (1) as Angie, Coby Ryan McLaughlin as Jeremy, Jack Plotnick as Mike
Director: Jon Cryer
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Eddie Gorodetsky, Jim Patterson
 
115 :05x19 - Waiting for the Right Snapper (May/19/2008)
Charlie tries to resist temptation when he meets the grown daughter of the woman he's dating and realizes they've met before.
Special Guest Stars: Susan Blakely (1) as Angie, | Guest Stars: Jane Lynch as Dr. Freeman, Rib Hillis as Justin, Coby Ryan McLaughlin as Jeremy, Virginia Williams as Tricia
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre
 

Season 6
116 :06x01 - Taterhead Is Our Love Child (Sep/22/2008)
Charlie runs into a former girlfriend who's so looks a lot like he does.
Guest Stars: Clint Culp as William, Brendan Patrick Connor as Clive, Meeghan Holaway as Brenda, Rena Sofer as Chrissy, Martin Mull as Russell, Matt Cates as Craig
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3)
 
117 :06x02 - Pie Hole, Herb (Sep/29/2008)
Charlie borrowed money from Alan and on the day he is supposed to pay him back, Alan goes to ask Charlie for the money. He again finds Charlie in bed with a beautiful woman. After Charlie shoos him out and assures him he'll get the money for him later that day, the woman asks if Charlie is really out of cash and Charlie tells her not to worry, that he has plenty of hooker money.
Starring Roles: Ryan Stiles as Herb, | Guest Stars: Lisa Jay (1) as Ginger
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
118 :06x03 - Damn You, Eggs Benedict (Oct/06/2008)
Charlie tries cooking, Alan tries dating two women at the same time and Jake tries beer.
Guest Stars: Bridget Flanery as Katie, Helena Mattsson as Angela, Nikita Ager as Stephanie, | Co-Guest Stars: Chet Grissom as Man
Director: Jean Sagal
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Don Foster (1) | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 
119 :06x04 - The Flavin' and the Mavin' (Oct/13/2008)
Charlie romances Alan's sweet receptionist as Alan anxiously awaits disaster.
Guest Stars: Kelly Stables as Melissa
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
120 :06x05 - A Jock Strap In Hell (Oct/20/2008)
The guys bump into Jake's former teacher who became a stripper after a fling with Charlie. Charlie tries to help her out by giving her a room and a job, but things spiral out of control.
Guest Stars: Alicia Witt as Miss Pasternak, Jaya Ramsey as Dancer, | Co-Guest Stars: Rob Poynter as Church Goer #8, Markham Reilly as Church Goer #5, Gerry Johnson (1) as Church Goer #9, Bob Jesser as Church Goer #7, Bob Gebert as Church Goer #6, Jennifer Bowman as Church Goer #3, Sandra Marshall (1) as Church Goer #2, Nicole Greenwood as Church Goer #1, Rochelle Greenwood as Church Goer #4
Director: Jean Sagal
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1)
 
121 :06x06 - It's Always Nazi Week (Nov/03/2008)
When Judith kicks Herb to the curb, Alan comes knocking.
Starring Roles: Ryan Stiles as Herb, | Guest Stars: Denise Loveday-kane as Mother, Jeanne Simpson as Mother #2, Mikki Padilla as Maureen, Jenn Liu as Gwyneth, | Co-Guest Stars: Shantel Wislawski as Kim
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Mark Roberts (3)
 
122 :06x07 - Best H.O. Money Can Buy (Nov/10/2008)
Alan tries to escape Judith's grasp as Charlie and Herb go on the prowl.
Guest Stars: Robert Clotworthy as TV Commercial, Daya Vaidya as Lucy, Brittney Powell as Clair, Ryan Stiles as Herb
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
123 :06x08 - Pinocchio's Mouth (Nov/17/2008)
Charlie's new girlfriend asks him to spend the night at her place, while Alan tries to enforce a punishment on Jake.
Guest Stars: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Jim Patterson
 
124 :06x09 - The Mooch At The Boo (Nov/24/2008)
Jake disappears with the daughter of Charlie's neighbor, a former NFL player, and Charlie is left to cover his back.
Guest Stars: Justin Alston as Employee, Bellamy Young as Diane, Tinashe Kachingwe as Celeste, Michael Clarke Duncan as Jerome
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers
 
125 :06x10 - He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited (Dec/08/2008)
Evelyn offers to pay for Jake's college education, leaving Alan to wonder if he ever needs to work again.
Guest Stars: Kelly Stables as Melissa, Jon Polito as Mr. Sharipa, Bob Levitan as Fireman #1, Jamal Thomas as Fireman #2
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
126 :06x11 - The Devil's Lube (Dec/15/2008)
Charlie contemplates his lifestyle after hearing an old partner has past away.

Source: cbs
Special Guest Stars: Melanie Lynskey as Rose, James Earl Jones (1) as Himself, Emilio Estevez as Andy, | Co-Guest Stars: Charlie Dell as Minister, Tamara Knausz as Girl #1, Cazzy Golomb as Girl #2
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3), Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky, Jim Patterson
 
127 :06x12 - Thank God for Scoliosis (Jan/12/2009)
Charlie and Jake fight for the affections of a waitress, while Alan fights sexual tension with his receptionist.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Robert Clotworthy as TV Commercial Announcer, Lillian Adams as Mrs. Freemantle, Emily Rose as Janine, Carol Kane (1) as Shelly, Kelly Stables as Melissa
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Jim Patterson, Eddie Gorodetsky | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Chuck Lorre
 
128 :06x13 - I Think You Offended Don (Jan/19/2009)
Judith is pregnant with a baby girl and Alan is convinced that he is the father. Meanwhile, Jake is in a contentious mood and Charlie thinks he knows why.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Ryan Stiles as Herb
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Chuck Lorre, Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Don Foster (1), Jim Patterson
 
129 :06x14 - David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie (Feb/02/2009)
Convinced that Alan's family doesn't fully appreciate him, Melissa invites Alan to live with her and her mom.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Kelly Stables as Melissa, Carol Kane (1) as Shelly, John Carney (2) as Jerry
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Jim Patterson
 
130 :06x15 - I'd Like to Start With the Cat (Feb/09/2009)
Charlie finds himself in couples counseling
Guest Stars: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Mark Roberts (3), Don Foster (1), Susan Beavers
 
131 :06x16 - She'll Still Be Dead At Halftime (Mar/02/2009)
Charlie has to remove a half-naked woman from his bedroom before Chelsea arrives.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, Diora Baird as Wanda
Director: Jeff Melman
Story: Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1)
 
132 :06x17 - The 'Ocu' Or The 'Pado'? (Mar/09/2009)
Charlie tells Chelsea that he loves her, but doesn't get the response he expects.

Source: CBS
Starring Roles: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, | Guest Stars: James Edson as Bobby, Jane Lynch as Dr. Freeman
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Jim Patterson, Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3)
 
133 :06x18 - My Son's Enormous Head (Mar/16/2009)
When Chelsea gets sick and Charlie has to take care of her, he must also fight the overwhelming urge to flee.

Source: CBS
Starring Roles: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, | Special Guest Stars: Martin Mull as Russell, | Guest Stars: Jennifer Hale as TV Announcer (V.O.), Eddie Gorodetsky as Sir Lancelot
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers
 
134 :06x19 - The Two Finger Rule (Mar/30/2009)
After Chelsea discovers a nude picture of another woman on Charlie's cell phone, he blows off steam by going out for a night of drinking with Alan, Herb and his neighbor.
Guest Stars: Michael Clarke Duncan as Jerome, Tinashe Kachingwe as Celeste
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers
 
135 :06x20 - Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau (Apr/13/2009)
Evelyn and Chelsea meet for the first time, and Charlie wants to make sure they never become friends.
Guest Stars: Meagen Fay (1) as Martha
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Lee Aronsohn, Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
136 :06x21 - Above Exalted Cyclops (Apr/27/2009)
Chelsea is asked by Alan to arrange a blind date between he and her new friend, unaware that her new friend is Rose.
Guest Stars: Melanie Lynskey as Rose
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1)
 
137 :06x22 - Sir Lancelot's Litter Box (May/04/2009)
Charlie mourns the loss of his bachelor pad as he reluctantly allows Chelsea to move in. Meanwhile, Alan discovers there is no longer much space left in the house for him.
Starring Roles: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, J. D. Walsh as Gordon
Director: Jon Cryer
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Don Foster (1) | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers
 
138 :06x23 - Good Morning, Mrs. Butterworth (May/11/2009)
As Alan and Chelsea bond, Charlie uses the free time to do the things that he likes to do on his own.
Starring Roles: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea
Director: Mark Roberts (3)
Story: Sid Youngers, Don Foster (1) | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Mark Roberts (3)
 
139 :06x24 - Baseball with Better Steroids (May/18/2009)
After hearing Mia is back in town, Charlie begins questioning his relationship with Chelsea. Meanwhile, Charlie, Alan and Herb rush Judith to the hospital when she goes into labor.
Starring Roles: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, Ryan Stiles as Herb, | Guest Stars: Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia, Kelly Stables as Melissa, Ken Lerner as Dr. Levine, | Co-Guest Stars: Joel Murray as Petey
Director: Lee Aronsohn
Story: Susan Beavers, Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn
 

Season 7
140 :07x01 - 818-jklpuzo (Sep/21/2009)
Charlie is forced to make a decision between his fiance, Chelsea, and an old flame, Mia.
Guest Stars: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, Jane Lynch as Dr. Linda Freeman, Emmanuelle Vaugier as Mia, Kelly Stabler as Melissa, Will Sasso as Andrew, Eddie Van Halen as Himself
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky
 
141 :07x02 - Whipped Unto the Third Generation (Sep/28/2009)
When Chelsea convinces Charlie to let Alan's new girlfriend, Melissa, move in, the girls end up taking over Charlie's house.
Guest Stars: Kelly Stables as Melissa, Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, Tinashe Kachingwe as Celeste
Director: James Widdoes
Writer: Mark Roberts (3)
 
142 :07x03 - Mmm, fish. Yum. (Oct/05/2009)
Alan ends up playing maid to Judith's new baby as well as his former mother-in-law. Meanwhile, Jake uses an incriminating photo to blackmail Charlie.
Special Guest Stars: Annie Potts as Lenore, | Guest Stars: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea, Ryan Stiles as Herb, David Mattey as Lou
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Don Foster (1) | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers, Jim Patterson
 
143 :07x04 - Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator (Oct/12/2009)
Alan starts working for Evelyn as Charlie works to fix the relationship between Chelsea and Jake.
Guest Stars: Robert Clotworthy as TV Announcer, Caroline Bielskis as Woman, Gerald Brodin as Man, Peter A. Hulne as Police Officer #2, Scott McShane as Police Officer #1, Kelly Stables as Melissa, Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Eddie Gorodetsky, Susan Beavers | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3)
 
144 :07x05 - For the Sake of the Child (Oct/19/2009)
Jake stops at nothing to get away from Charlie and Alan, after they embarrass him out in public.
Guest Stars: Paulina Olszynski as Trudy, Skyler Caleb as Server
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3), Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Jim Patterson
 
145 :07x06 - Give Me Your Thumb (Nov/02/2009)
Charlie kicks Alan out after he suggests that Chelsea get breast reduction surgery.
Guest Stars: Steve Hytner as Dr. Schenkman, | Co-Guest Stars: Claudia Choi as Nurse
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Mark Roberts (3), Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: David Richardson (1)
 
146 :07x07 - Untainted by Filth (Nov/09/2009)
Alan and Charlie are shocked when they wake up next to a strange woman, and try to find out what happened.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Di Guan as Chinese Acrobat #2, Haitao Duan as Chinese Acrobat #1, Jackie Zane as Bearded Lady, Marc Mazur as Strong Man, Kevin Bickford as Clown, Joe Gieb as Ted, Arturo Gil as Ed, Arthur Darbinyan as Joe, Katy Mixon as Betsy
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Don Foster (1) | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky
 
147 :07x08 - Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle. (Nov/16/2009)
While overcoming a bad break-up, Chelsea invites her beautiful college roommate to stay at the house.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Tricia Helfer as Gail, Robert Clotworthy as TV Announcer
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Jim Patterson, Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1)
 
148 :07x09 - Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair (Nov/23/2009)
While Alan struggles to cure his baldness, Charlie deals with the problem that he can't satisfy Chelsea.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Jim Patterson, Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1) | Teleplay: Chuck Lorre, Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3)
 
149 :07x10 - That's Why They Call It Ball Room (Dec/07/2009)
Chelsea wants Charlie to take dancing lessons for the wedding, when Charlie uncovers the truth that Chelsea has been lying about her finances
Guest Stars: Judith Drake as Cynthia, Jeanette O'Connor as Debbie, Jennifer Taylor as Chelsea
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Jim Patterson | Teleplay: Eddie Gorodetsky, Don Foster (1), Mark Roberts (3), Lee Aronsohn
 
150 :07x11 - Warning, It's Dirty (Dec/14/2009)

View Trailer
Jake is taught the art of infidelity by Charlie, whose girlfriend is away for Christmas.

Source: CBS
Special Guest Stars: Carl Reiner as Marty, | Guest Stars: Tinashe Kachingwe as Celeste, Ingrid Rogers as Keisha, | Co-Guest Stars: Julia Kelleher as Brianna
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Chuck Lorre, Mark Roberts (3) | Teleplay: Don Foster (1), Eddie Gorodetsky, Lee Aronsohn
 
151 :07x12 - Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste (Jan/11/2010)
In order to woo his ex-girlfriend, Jake begins writing love songs, while Herb and Alan attempt to hide their secret friendship from the watchful eye of Judith.

Source: CBS
Guest Stars: Ryan Stiles as Herb
Director: James Widdoes
Story: Lee Aronsohn, Mark Roberts (3), Don Foster (1), Chuck Lorre | Teleplay: Susan Beavers, Eddie Gorodetsky, Jim Patterson, David Richardson (1)
 
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