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The weight loss pills being advertised on WKRP seems to be for 'legalized speed' but the new client has an iron clad contract.

Episode Info

Episode number: 4x12
Production Number: 080
Airdate: Wednesday January 20th, 1982

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Guest Stars
Max Wright (1)
As Frank Bartman
Robert Ridgely
As Dave Wickerman
Main Cast
Gordon Jump
As Arthur "Big Guy" Carlson
Episode Quotes
Johnny: (to Herb) You know, your ... friend here is rather reptilian. But if you put him on the air, you are definitely a snake.

Mr Carlson: Where do they go, anyway, Travis?
Andy: What's that, sir?
Mr Carlson: The donuts. When I eat those suckers, they go straight for my beltline. When you eat them, apparently they turn into hair.

Herb: You wanna lose some weight?!
Andy: Maybe. Maybe 160 pounds of polyester.

Wickerman: What's this about not running the spots?
Mr Carlson: Well, funny thing... would you believe we're sold out?
Wickerman: WKRP? (laughs uproariously)

Lawyer: You don't pay my retainer, you know. Your mother does. So I'm gonna be reporting to her.
Mr Carlson: You will.
Lawyer: Uh huh. Your mother doesn't go to court. It's far too expensive, and it's messy. So if it's your intention to ignore my advice, I'm gonna tell on you.

Venus: Andy, real speed is gone because it killed everybody. Junkies don't even want it back!
Johnny: And once the Republicans got in, everyone just switched to downers!

Johnny: Whereas it is stricly the opinion of this announcer, and therefore by no means a proveable fact, the sponser you're about to hear from is, to wit, a real scumbucket.
(The commercial follows, played at various speeds)

Mr Carlson: All right ladies, let me tell you what I think we ought to do. Jennifer, would you please call my lawyer? Bailey, would you mind bringing me the heads of Johnny Fever and Venus Flytrap on a platter? Where's Travis?
Jennifer: Downstairs, donut shop.
Mr Carlson: Call down and tell him never to come in here again. And have Les beaten up for no particular reason.
Bailey: Oh, I'll handle that. What about Herb?
Mr Carlson: Herb is mine. Thank you, ladies. Gee! Pleasure doing business with women.

Lawyer: Well, I think the legal term for it would be "Your keister is in a sling."
Mr Carlson: Ooo boy.

Andy: All right, out of the way guys, Herbert's going on the air.
Johnny: You know, it's funny. You work here long enough, you start hallucinating.
Andy: Get out!
Johnny: Herb's going on the air?
Andy: Yeah.
Venus: Does this mean we'll have to go out and sell something?

Warning: WKRP in Cincinnati season 4 episode 12 guide may contain spoilers
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