(Johnny protests the surprise party for Les)
Bailey: Don't you like putting on a stupid-looking hat and hiding behind furniture, and generally stripping yourself of every shred of human dignity?
Johnny: Now that you mention it, I do like that.
Herb: You know, Jennifer was going to give me a party once - a big one. But then I decided not to quit, and it just kinda got called off.
Johnny: Tough luck for all of us.
Andy: You want ski talk? I'll give you ski talk. Mogul. Ski lift. Slalom. Girls. Drunk.
(Bailey is not impressed)
Les: Fever, in exactly twelve seconds, the air will be dead.
Johnny: I thought you were just going to murder the news!
Mr Carlson: (on the phone) Jennifer? Send Nessman in here immediately.
Les: (running in) Mr Carlson?
Mr Carlson: Tell Travis I'd like to see him too. (Andy runs in) Thanks, Jennifer.
Les: You know, this isn't easy for me. I don't usually 'spill my guts,' as they say.
Mr Carlson: (despairingly) Oh no.
Mr Carlson: You know, I had a dream once, Les, of one day becoming General Manager of WKRP. And I worked hard at that. Then one day mother gave me the job... boy, don't tell me dreams don't come true!
Jennifer: (forcefully to Andy) Put on the damn hat.
Jennifer: Whaddya say, guys - triple vodkas all the way around?
Venus: (introducing the guests he's not supposed to have in the booth) This is Adelle, she's my broker, and this is Tiffany, she's my book keeper.
Jennifer: I like it when Les does the news. It's always so surreal.
(Mrs Nessman meets the gang)
Mr Carlson: I'd like to introduce you to Andy Travis.
Mrs Nessman: The selfish one.
Mr Carlson: Well, that's right. This is Doctor Johnny Fever.
Mrs Nessman: Oh yes, the beatnik. You're cute!
Johnny: I...I...I have to go back on the air now, or I'd stay and get better acquainted.
Mr Carlson: Oh, and this is our receptionist, Jennifer Marlowe.
Mrs Nessman: Stay away from my son. He's told me everything.
Jennifer: I'll try.