Linda: A lot women throw their panties at Tom Jones.
Dharma: Yeah, but Maude didn't take hers off!
Dharma: (After Greg breaks the window) Do you have anything between fuddy duddy and criminal?
Dharma: Oh, Honey, listen. My parents called and instead of taking us to lunch tomorrow for our first anniversary they thought we should all go out and plant trees together.
Dharma: Because the first anniversary is the paper anniversary.
Dharma: Paper comes from trees.
Greg: So...by replenishing the source of paper other couples have dimished, we're balancing our karmic debt with the planet.
Dharma: Wow! A year ago you would have thought that was just crazy.
Greg: Yeah. Look at me grow.
Larry: So, Abby's parents had no idea what I'd planted in the corner of their farm. All they know is the cows are grazing their brains out and acting all paranoid.
Dharma: ...I'm not doing backflips about having dinner with your parents at Café Snooty.
Greg: Actually, Café Snooty was booked, but they got us a table at the Pompous Room