Going with the highbrow factor, I'm going to give this one to...
For the next two weeks or so:
Kippe-yi-yay, Carl Kolchak!
Does this toupee make me look stupid?
No honey, we're not going to play "Cowboy and Naughty Cowgirl" tonight.
"Clem, is that two cowboys there havin' sex on Brokeback Mountain?"