Ed: Hello, you have a visitor.
Ironside: What does he want?
Ed: Your job.
Eve: He's your replacement. It's high school youth day, you know, acting mayor, acting DA, acting Supervisor, acting Chief Ironside.
Ed: It's Ted Berringer Jr.
Ironside: Well, I'm glad to meet you, Ted. I know your father both professionally and personally.
Ted Berringer: Yes, sir, I know.
Ironside: Well, we'll try to make your day interesting here, sit down, make it interesting and hopefully informative.
Ted Berringer: Thank you. But before we begin, sir, there's something I need to tell you. I didn't ask to be assigned here.
Ironside: You mean you didn't want to be?
Ted Berringer: That's right.
Ironside: Well I'd be interested in knowing why, if you care to tell me.
Ted Berringer: Because I don't approve of the way you do things.
Ironside: Well, in that case, let's hope the day will be mutually informative.
Ironside: Before we get started on the rest of our daily schedule, I have a very important question to ask you.
Ted Berringer: Yes, sir?
Ironside: Do you like chili?
Ted Berringer: Yeah.
Ironside: All right, Eve. You heat up an extra bowl of chili.
Eve: I don't know, Chief, these gourmet meals take a lot of practice.
Ted Berringer: What would you do if you saw a man breaking the law that you thought was a bad law?
Ironside: I'd arrest him.
Ted Berringer: So what about the Boston Tea Party? They broke the law.
Ironside: I'd be in charge of the Boston Police on December 16th, 1773. I would have arrested the colonists who threw that tea in the harbor.
Mark: And he doesn't even like tea.
Ironside: The issue of taxation without representation might have been fought out in court instead of on the battlefield.
Ted Berringer: But King George would have won.
Ironside: Not necessarily.
Ironside: Incidentally, I've been meaning to ask you, how did you subdue Miss Stockton so readily? I thought she was prepared to go at least three falls.
Ted Berringer Sr.: Reason, logic, and a bit of silver-tongued oratory. I simply told the young lady if she didn't behave herself, I'd knock all her teeth out.
Ed: I always knew you were a very persuasive lawyer.