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Joan of Arcadia: The Gift

After God tells Joan to give Adam a gift, she finds something that leads her to wonder if God's suggesting she have sex with him. While secretly searching through Adam's backpack for gift ideas, Joan is stunned to find a condom there. She soon wonders if sex is the "gift" God had in mind, and she nervously ponders whether or not she'd be ready for such a big step. Meanwhile, Kevin begins covering court proceedings for the paper and ends up causing a stir in one of Will's cases.

Episode Info  

Episode number: 1x22
Production Number: 121
Airdate: Friday May 14th, 2004

Guest Stars
Aaron HimelsteinAaron Himelstein
As Friedman
April GraceApril Grace
As Sergeant Toni Williams
Becky WahlstromBecky Wahlstrom
As Grace Polk
Chris MarquetteChris Marquette
As Adam Rove
Diane DelanoDiane Delano
As Coach Carol Keady
Kris LemcheKris Lemche
As Cute Boy (God)
Mageina TovahMageina Tovah
As Glynis Figliola
Christian MeoliChristian Meoli
As Ben Pollack
Corey Michael BlakeCorey Michael Blake
As Henry Taschen
Dennis CockrumDennis Cockrum
As Roger Franz
Elizabeth LiangElizabeth Liang
As Erica Stevenson
Helen WatsonHelen Watson
As PD Carly Menken
John C. MoskoffJohn C. Moskoff
As Mr. Petrov
Michael WyleMichael Wyle
As French Waiter (God)
Ryan KoczaraRyan Koczara
As ADA Barry Frost
Susan SullivanSusan Sullivan
As Rich Woman (God)
Main Cast
Joe MantegnaJoe Mantegna
As Will Girardi
Mary SteenburgenMary Steenburgen
As Helen Girardi
Amber TamblynAmber Tamblyn
As Joan Girardi
Jason RitterJason Ritter
As Kevin Girardi
Michael WelchMichael Welch
As Luke Girardi
ArtistSong TitlePlayed When
Cyndi LauperLa Vie En Rose 
DakonaGood (I've Got A Lot To Learn) 
Julie PlugI Feel 
Los Lonely BoysHeaven 
StevieHard Times 
The TrewsConfessions 
Troy GassawaySee You 

Episode Quotes
Adam: He didn't have to throw an eraser at me!
Joan: Adam, I know the 19th century can be a snooze, but you were snoring. Like the Three Stooges with the little "wee!" at the end.

Helen: (to Joan) You were alone with Adam at a hotel, and you love him...
Will: But he was shampooing the rug. I'm a cop, Joan, this is when I start reading you your rights.

Helen: (referring to Joan and Adam) She thought about it, but she didn't sleep with him.
Will: And we believe that?
Helen: What choice do we have?
Will: We could tell her she can't see him anymore.
Helen: Ahhh, the West Side Story Strategy. Yeah, that always works out real well.

Coach Keady: Cardiovascular exercise increases blood flow to the brain, thereby increasing your chances for higher grades on your finals.
Friedman: (to himself) Then how come the football team can't spell?
Coach Keady: Mr Friedman, you're flailing. It's unattractive.

Joan: Okay lets pretend it's Christmas and we're opening gifts. Look, I got a puppy!
Adam: You want a puppy?
Joan: No way, they poop all the time.

Joan: I did not have sex with Adam.
Helen: Are you sure?

Helen: Oh, and Adam, would you ask your girlfriend not to be so snotty to the faculty?

Joan: You might be God, but you're a little clueless.

Will: So the cleaner gets taken to the cleaner. The irony, that's what I love about the job.

Joan: Do you really think...?
Helen: What do you think we think?
Will: Of course we think, what would you think?
Joan: Is this a real conversation or an Abbott & Costello routine?

God: Faith is believing when there's no rational reason to believe.

Grace: Guys should be sprayed down with cold water, like every hour.

Joan: (to Cute Guy (God)) Great, you have a locker now. What do you keep in there – wrath?

Grace: I'm not getting involved. I say something wrong, you two break up and I'm stuck with Friedman as a friend.

Joan: Adam, you believed in yourself.
Adam: No, you believed in me. And it felt good.

Joan: (to God) You want me to ace French? Why don't you make the language easier? Or make it...English?

Rich Woman (God): You're always faced with difficult decisions. I can't make your choices for you - I'm really committed to the free will thing.

Helen: Let me finish!
Joan: No! Because you're going to start crying and quoting songs.

Adam: (to Joan and Grace in gym) Why are you two speeding? Being last is our thing.

Will: Remember when I took you on the pony ride?

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