Regine: What is long, black and at the curb?
Khadijah: I ain't touching it.
Max: The bottom line is, men are nothing but speed bumps on the road to happiness.
Regine: I think they're more like cheap pantyhose. At the worst possible moment, they run on you.
Synclaire: But did you ever stop to think what the world would be like with no men?
Khadijah: A bunch of fat, happy women and no crime!
Synclaire: Go ahead, Regine. Let it out. Cry. If you don't, your tear ducts will get blocked up, and when you're old, you won't be able to cry.
Khadijah: Just when we thought it was safe to let you back into the conversation.
Kyle: Dealing with a woman is like playing a basketball game. And brothers like you dribble around the perimeter fixing vacuums while a man like ME drives straight up the middle and slams!
Overton: Yeah, but remember that time that girl called that three-second violation on your ass.
Regine: Come on, everyone. Look happy. Khadijah, do your best.
Synclaire: How do you know everything he's going to say?
Max: He's a man. They never vary from the script.
Regine: Why does this keep happening to me?
Max: 'Cause you keep looking for someone to carry you.
Regine: Well, what's wrong with that?
Khadijah: They keep droppin' your ass.
Khadijah: (to Regine) Men dump you like Eddie Murphy albums.
A reference to actor/comedian Eddie Murphy's largely unsuccessful singing career.
Synclaire: I know your Aries rising is constantly conflicting with her Taurus moon, but can't we all just get along?
"Can't we all just get along?" was famously said by Rodney King as he called for peace during the 1992 Los Angeles riots that followed the acquittals of four LAPD officers who were caught on video tape beating him.
Khadijah: Who can I get with no notice?
Synclaire: Mike Tyson! I know where he is. He's gonna be there for a while.
A reference to the former heavyweight boxing champion, who was incarcerated for rape at the time.
Kyle: (to Overton) My brother, this ain't Home Improvement.
A reference to the hit 1990s ABC sitcom starring Tim Allen as the host of a home repairs show.
Khadijah: (on phone) Well, did you tell him that I watched every episode of You Bet Your Life?
A reference to Bill Cosby's short-lived 1990s revival of the famous game show originally hosted by Groucho Marx.
Khadijah: Damn. I should have told him I ate Jell-O.
A reference to Bill Cosby's role as spokesperson in a series of ads for Jell-O products.
Synclaire: Didn't you follow that lead I gave you?
Khadijah: Yeah. It turns out Nipsey Russell's doing dinner theatre.
A reference to the comedian and frequent game-show panelist.
Regine: (to Brad) I am not your baby tonight!
A reference to "I'm Your Baby Tonight," a song that hit #1 for Whitney Houston in late 1990.
Khadijah: Do you know how degrading it is to get hung up on by Slappy White's manager who doubles as his cook?
A reference to the comedian who enjoyed his greatest fame in the 1950s and 1960s, often working with Redd Foxx.
Max: (to Regine) You can do anything. You're a woman.
Synclaire: Hear you roar!
A reference to Helen Reddy's 1972 hit "I Am Woman," a feminist anthem that includes the line, "I am woman, hear me roar."
Regine: Ladies, on the other side of that door stands Michelangelo's David, a.k.a. my Brad.
A reference to the statue of a nude man created by the Renaissance artist between 1501 and 1504.
Overton: I heard he got the lead in Gypsy.
Overton claims that Nipsey Russell is starring in the musical based on the 1957 memoirs of striptease artist Gypsy Rose Lee.