Ladies and gentlemen — we have now reached a new era of television: The Age of the Spin-Off Series! As a society, we've basically become incapable of bidding farewell to our favorite shows. (Heck, pretty soon our spin-offs are probably going to get spin-offs.) But it's not just the storylines that we miss…it's all the memorable characters we've met along the way.
But have no fear, TVRage is here to help enable your television addiction — we suffer from a pretty severe case ourselves — by providing you with numerous spin-off ideas centered around the unforgettable guest stars from the popular cult hit 'Arrested Development.' Thanks to the gods of Netflix, this series returned for a much deserved fourth season back in May, leaving fans to wonder how they were ever able to survive without this merry band of misfits in the first place. Luckily for you, we happen to have a few spin-off suggestions that could keep these beloved characters in the limelight where they belong.
Here's what we've come up with...
1. Character: Larry Middleman
Played By: Bob Einstein
Spin-Off Title: 'There's Something About Larry'
Synopsis: Tired of acting as George Bluth Sr.'s surrogate eyes and ears, Larry makes a brave attempt to venture out on his own and discover who he really is. Unfortunately, since he's been living in other people's shoes for so long, he begins going through a rather serious identity crisis. But with the help of his attractive shrink, along with several other characters he meets along the way, Larry works to develop a sense of self and understand who he is deep down. (Please note that no inappropriate hair gel was used in the making of this show idea.)
2. Character: Phillip Litt
Played By: Zach Braff
Spin-Off Title: 'Phil's-osophy'
Synopsis: After a drunken night of wild partying, Phillip gets fired from his directorial position at 'Girls With Low Self-Esteem' and is forced to work at a gas station just to make ends meet. After interacting with a few fully-clothed customers, Phillip discovers there are way more important things in life than filming drunk college chicks (who knew, right?) and vows to turn his life around. He begins spreading his "never-nude" philosophy to the public, speaking at high schools and colleges throughout the country as part of an abstinence program. Because when you're never-nude, you're never naughty. Right?
3. Character: Lupe
Played By: BW Gonzalez
Spin-Off Title: 'Looney Lupe'
Synopsis: Serving as the Bluth family housekeeper is enough to drive anyone crazy, which unfortunately is exactly what happens to poor ole Lupe. The ex-maid checks herself into the looney bin where she's introduced to some of the oddest characters she's ever seen. (Hey, it is a mental ward, after all.) And don't be surprised if her former employers decide to drop by for the occasional visit. Knowing this family, they'd probably feel right at home.
4. Character: Stan Sitwell
Played By: Ed Begley Jr.
Spin-Off Title: 'Blue Stan Group'
Synopsis: Fed up with being mocked about his inability to grow hair anywhere on his body, Stan ventures out in search of some friends. Like Tobias, he too stumbles upon a Blue Man Group ad and mistakenly believes it to be a support group for severely depressed men (as one does). Upon learning otherwise, he ends up becoming a full blown member of the theater organization and becomes completely comfortable in his freshly painted, wig-less skin. During their Broadway run, Larry blue himself at least once a day and twice on Sunday.
5. Character: Doctor Fishman
Played By: Ian Roberts
Spin-Off Title: 'Paging Dr. Punk'd'
Synopsis: Dr. Fishman's tendency to be way too literal — like telling a family that they'd "lost" a loved one when really they'd just gone missing — has finally caught up with him. After his 200th miscommunication (umm…congrats?), he is promptly fired from the hospital, leaving him quite literally without a roof over his head. So he decides to use his unique talent as a source of entertainment for the only ones who could ever truly appreciate it: television audiences! In time, he becomes one of the best pranksters in the business, making Ashton Kutcher's gig look like child's play. His tagline is: "Get literal or get lost."
6. Character: Rita Leeds
Played By: Charlize Theron
Spin-Off Title: 'Follow My Leed'
Synopsis: As everyone except Michael Bluth may have noticed, Rita is portrayed as being a little…slow, so to speak. However, thanks in large part to her stunning good looks and charmingly exuberant presence on camera, this blonde Brit soon finds herself the host of a children's TV show. Sure, she doesn't exactly need the money due to her wealthy heiress status in Wee Britain. But she doesn't care and the producers love her. Little do they know, she's actually learning just as much as the kids are.
7. Character: Tony Wonder
Played By: Ben Stiller
Spin-Off Title: 'Wonder Wings'
Synopsis: Remember that time Tony lost a testicle thanks to a live dove that was in his pants? Well, the magician never quite got over that day, which prompted him to develop a serious vendetta against all types of birds. And what better way to do this than to pursue a career dedicated to serving massive amounts of dead poultry/fowl to the public. Welcome to Wonder Wings, where justice is served.
8. Character: Gene Parmesan (you may recognize this one from somewhere)
Played By: Martin Mull
Spin-Off Title: 'Hi-Gene'
Synopsis: After accidentally contracting an STD from one of his many disguises, this private detective quits working for the Bluths (his one and only client) and goes on to become a doctor who specializes in hygiene. He even develops a mild (yet hilarious) case of OCD and makes it his life's mission to rid the world of all forms of diseases. Think of it like a sitcom version of 'ER.'
9. Character: Carl Weathers
Played By: Himself
Spin-Off Title: 'Under the Weather'
Synopsis: When the documentary 'Scandalmakers' ceases to make a big profit, Carl is forced to get creative and opens up a faux private practice office in Hollywood that specializes in "acting healthy." He convinces his (admittedly dim) clients that their ailments can be cured simply by taking his acting class and pretending to be a healthy person. This will, obviously, trick their bodies into believing that they are, in fact, healthy and voilà — magically cured! Successfully taking the art of mooching to a whole new level. Gene Parmesan has most likely already signed up for a session.
10. Character: Maggie Lizer
Played By: Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Spin-Off Title: 'Miss Magnolia'
Synopsis: After years of practicing law in Orange County, Maggie decides to make a major career shift and competes in the National Miss USA Beauty Pageant. In true Maggie-fashion, she uses her (fake) blindness to help garner popularity among the viewers and earn the judges' empathy. Think of it like a messed up version of 'Miss Congeniality.' You know you wanna watch it.
11. Character: Lucille Austero (Lucille Two)
Played By: Liza Minnelli
Spin-Off Title: 'Lu-Seal the Deal'
Synopsis: Buster may have been blamed for Lucille Two's suspected murder, but have no fear. This veteran socialite is alive and well. In fact, her control over the Bluth Company made her so power hungry that she began dabbling in the corrupt world of investment banking. There is no deal she can't make — no client she can't win over. Once Lucille Two puts her stamp of approval on something, there's no stopping it. Now if only she could overcome that whole vertigo thing.
12. Character: Barry Zuckerkorn
Played By: Henry Winkler
Spin-Off Title: 'Breaking Barry'
Synopsis: After getting fired from his one and only client, the Bluths, Barry decides to really make an effort to turn his attorney practice around by becoming a criminal lawyer. And by that I don't just mean representing criminals…I mean becoming a full-fledged criminal himself. That's right, Barry is about to break bad and delve into the wonderful world of the meth-making business. And if he needs any tips, he can always call Saul Goodman.
13. Character: Kitty Sanchez
Played By: Judy Greer
Spin-Off Title: 'Hello Kitty'
Synopsis: Given her past sexual history (not to mention her constant desire to flash Michael at every turn), it should come as no surprise to learn that Kitty is now leading her life as a full-fledged stripper. When her job at Imagine Entertainment falls by the wayside, this little siren knew it was time to do what she does best: take her clothes off in front of other people. (I mean, she does it anyway, so why not get paid for it?) Her ultimate goal is to own the bar herself one day and eventually beat Lucille Bluth in a drinking contest — the latter of which we all know is just never going to happen.
14. Character: Steve Holt
Played By: Justin Grant Wade
Spin-Off Title: 'Holt It Right There'
Synopsis: Unfortunately, not much has changed for this has-been jock. Still overweight, balding, and working in pest control, Steve was never able to get over being neglected and basically ignored by his father, Gob. He's way too depressed to make any sort of changes with his life and is constantly holding (or rather, Holting?) himself back. To pass the time, he buys everything and anything from those late night TV informercials, which eventually leads him to star in an episode of 'Hoarders.' YEAH, STEVE HOLT!