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  Saturday, August 9th 2008 10:59 am  
» Funny lines and whatnot
1. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a tumble dryer.
3. Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
4. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
5. McMurphy fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a paper bag filled with vegetable soup.
6. Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the centre
7. The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fan set on medium.
8. Her vocabulary was as bad as, kinda' like, sorta, whatever.
9. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
10. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease
11. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Ballina at 6:36 pm travelling at 55 mph, the other from Claremorris 4:19pm at a speed of 35 mph.
12. The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the full stop after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.
13. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
14. The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
15. The red brick wall was the colour of a brick-red crayon.
16. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.
17. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
18. The plan was simple, like my brother Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
19. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating

 
Reactions (3)
SultanPeppershaker

Posts: 19450
Contrib Points: 831.5
Since: 24/Jan/06
Posted on Saturday, August 9th 2008 12:46 pm 
Ha ha! Five stars.... out of a possible four!
 
holophonor

Posts: 11108
Contrib Points: 4362.9
Since: 30/Nov/05
Posted on Saturday, August 9th 2008 2:36 pm 
Quote:
9. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
My favorite.

I remember reading a list like this before. There was a hilarious one about the solar eclipse, but I can't remember what it was. But trust me, it was hilarious.
 
nishikaze

Posts: 6780
Contrib Points: 1155.7
Since: 29/Jan/06
Posted on Sunday, August 10th 2008 5:02 am 
Quote:
The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease


Okay... Who fries maggots in hot grease? Did some idiot actually try this?

Were they alive or dead?
 
Gus

Gus


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