The Middleman: If we don’t crack this, we’re going to end up manacled to a doomsday device while a friendly female voice counts down the seconds to detonation.
Wendy: Will this scenario involve me wearing a bikini again?
The Middleman: Not necessary. But it will involve a carefully worded monologue, which will be the last thing we hear.
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Wendy: So you want a cold pocket?
Tyler: Oh for the love of… you cooked, too?
Wendy: Hot Pockets are the American empanada.
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The Middleman: Dubbie, it is I, the Middleman.
Wendy: Really? Calling me on the Middlewatch that only we have?
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Wendy: Who leaves a palindrome?
The Middleman: Typical super-villain horse feathers. Can’t wait to hear this guy’s monologue. “I am the Palindrome. Feel my power. Power my feel. Palindrome the am I.” Peter piping weirdos.
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Pip: I’m sorry? Mirror universe?
Wendy: A parallel universe, where everyone who’s good is evil and evil is good. It’s like that episode of Star Trek where Spock had a goatee and Chekov tried to…
Pip: Star Trek? You mean the sci-series from the 60s starring the great George Takei?
Wendy: It is an evil universe.
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The Middleman:: If anyone knows where Wendy is, it’s he. Come puppet blood, monkey fudge, or terracotta, I’m getting her back.
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Parallel Universe Ida: I’ll be over here exalting in the fact I can’t get cancer.
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Wendy: Maniacal laughter. Didn’t see that one coming.
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Palindrome: But that’s impossible, Niels Bohr died while building it…
Together: … in 1962.
The Middleman: Ah, Bohr, he’s anything but. You should see the Christmas card he sent me last year. What a gas.
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Joe 90: Oh God. They’re gonna put me in the beard.
Lacey: Beard?
Joe 90: Standard Fatboy employee torture protocol. It always starts with the beard of bees.
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Wendy: Is this who you are?
Mirror Wendy: You’re right. What am I doing? I can’t do this.
Wendy and Mirror Lacey: Really?
Mirror Wendy: Psych. Guards!
Wendy: Well, it was worth a shot.
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The Middleman: You know, Dubbie, when I saw my mirror self through that gateway, a single question went through my mind.
Wendy: No, you would not look cooler with an eye patch.
The Middleman: A man’s got to wonder.
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Parallel Universe Ida: All right, kiddies, let’s kick some coil-tailed bacon.
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