Gunter: Hello, Martine. You caught me at a bad time--I'm alive.
Physician: Sometimes when people receive organs, they also take on the personality of the donor.
Gunter: So, uh, I have the face of a good cop with mostly male friends. That means I might start helping little old ladies across the street while dreaming of penis.
Gunter: As bad as I have been in my life, Eva, you are worse. Because you pretend to be respectable. I am through calling you bitch. This is not good enough.
Braden: How about harpy?
Gunter: Yes. Succubus. This implies witchcraft and the snatching of souls. You succubus! Thank you for making this so simple.
Gunter: At least now we can put a name with the missing face, huh? Paolo Sabatini. Hmm.
Karl: Where have I heard that name before?
Gunter: When I just said it. He was one of Racken's henchmen. A guy who hated women and would kill someone just for smiling at him. Despite those good qualities, I did not like this fellow.
Gunter: Look at you. So tough. The only way you could give a man pleasure in bed is if you shared half a sandwich.
Racken's Mafiosi #1: May I ask, with all the bodyguards here, you picked the black guy for this degradation?
Racken: Hey. Hey, hey. Do not go there. Seriously. I got lots of black guys in my mob. You may not know this, I was the first guy to recruit kids from low-test-score schools. It was like, it was like no—no juvenile delinquent left behind. It was a hell of a program.
Racken: I know who is responsible for all this. Tannhauser. He's not a normal criminal, obviously. Probably never ate a hoagie in his life. You know, I'm going to drag his agoraphobic ass out in the street and make him eat snails. And I do not mean escargot. Hell no. I mean live, American slugs from the garden of a Detroit City autoworker.
Braden: This city is in its very darkest hour.
Gunter: Is there an eclipse today? I encourage you to look directly into it.
Gunter: The question is, is the enemy of your enemy your enemy? Or is the enemy of your enemy your friend?
Braden: I have two enemies. Tannhauser and Racken. So is the enemy of my enemy my enemy? Or is the enemy of my other enemy my enemy or friend?
Karl: No. They can all be your enemies. Giving you three enemies.
Braden: Well, then, I have four enemies because I don't trust Gunter.
Karl: Making the question whether the enemy of your enemy is your enemy or friend, followed by whether that enemy is the friend of your enemy or of the second enemy? And whether one or all three are enemies of Gunter, who is the enemy of both your enemies? Or perhaps not of your third enemy, who could also be your friend.
Gunter: Hagerman, before this month is over, I will kill you.
Braden: Hagerman! Stop vomiting in my recycling bin!
Woman at Post Office: Who do you think you are, cutting in front of me?
Gunter: I am a sociopath in a post office. Please, do not make me resort to cliched behavior. I would prefer to kill you somewhere more upscale.
Gunter: I am an expert on Japanese women. Most efficient sex I've ever had. I remember having sex in a rickshaw. Made all the impressive since my sex partner was doing the running. And she still gave me head without breaking a sweat. Wunderbar.
Gunter: Using Gilbert & Sullivan for genocide is very creative. Me, I'm more of a jazz artist. Like Miles Davis with a 12 gauge.