Episode Quotes
Real Estate Agent: All right, well this. It's an emotion property. Ideal for any multi-generational family.
Marilyn: We're not just any family.
Real Estate Agent: Well, the sun shines more on this house than any other house in the neighborhood.
Marilyn: Not a future we're looking for.
Real Estate Agent: That's a horrible place. Horrible things happened there. They found dozens of graves in the backyard.
Marilyn: Umm-hmm.
Real Estate Agent: Maybe you could buy the lot once the grounds have been cleansed.
Marilyn: My aunt and uncle prefer pre-cleansed.
Real Estate Agent: Miss, there may be dead homeless people in the walls.
Marilyn: Then they found a home after all.
Eddie: I didn't get to say goodbye to anybody.
Herman: Moving away is a form of goodbye.
Eddie: Hmm, not really. Did Grandpa try to eat somebody again? Is that why we had to leave?
Herman: No, not Grandpa.
Marilyn: Grandpa, cover yourself. What will the neighbors think?
Grandpa: The neighbors should be more concerned with what I'm thinking.
Herman: You couldn't love Eddie any harder.
Lily: I could've if I breast-fed. He was just so pink and plump.
Herman: You have to stop thinking of him as fragile and/or edible.
Grandpa: You're too attached to how things were, only "were" is now werewolf.
Herman: You hired nannies to raise him and then he ate the nannies.
Grandpa: That's what they were hired for!
Grandpa: I preferred it when the village was further away and we had a moat.
Marilyn: The best moats are made of good manners and filled with congeniality.
Grandpa: Then I shall make cookies.
Grandpa: Marilyn, I adore you. I was the one who talked your mother out of eating you.
Grandpa: My son-in-law would forget his head if it wasn't sewn on.
Marilyn: Also, as an intermediary step, sometimes deer want to be eaten. They're depressed and lonely, so that lion's doing the deer a favor.
Eddie: That deer didn't look depressed.
Marilyn: No, I know. I thought I saw it smile.
Eddie: Does anyone eat the lion?
Marilyn: Grandpa.
Eddie: Mom, I think something's wrong with Grandpa. He took off all of his clothes and then ate a lion.
Lily: You weren't at the zoo, were you?
Lily: The circle of life is a violent shape.
Eddie: It is when Grandpa's drawing it.
Herman: Don't turn the neighbors into your blood slaves.
Grandpa: So you came all the way out here just to complain about helpful neighbors?
Grandpa: So it's open, honest dialogue with my grandson you disapprove of?
Herman: You're not being open and honest. You're being weird and confusing. You ate a lion while naked.
Grandpa: The lion was naked. It seemed polite.
Grandpa: You shouldn't be too hard on yourself for bringing him up that way. You couldn't have known, how could you? After Marilyn, we all assumed the worst.
Herman: He was born just like I was.
Grandpa: Yep, that's the worse we were assuming.
Herman: What will we tell Eddie?
Grandpa: The truth.
Herman: That I stole the heart of his Wildlife pack leader that you exsanguinated?
Grandpa: Well, he'd learn a brand-new word, for starters.
Grandpa: The strangest thing about grieving is realizing the loved one's death really isn't that big of a deal.
Grandpa: Marriage and mortality. Till death do us part. I have had many brides. All dead now. But we keep in touch.
Eddie: My grandpa's going to eat you.
Marilyn: Is that happening tonight?
Eddie: Um-hmm.
Grandpa: Kids.