Episode Quotes
Luke: I just want to drive a really big machine.
Grace: Is that all men are about?
Joan: Apparently...
Personable Woman (God): I just thought I'd ask. Show I care...because I do.
Helen: Honey, what you did was incredible. I'm so proud of you. And if you ever do it again, I'll kill you.
Joan: The other stalls are free. How about giving me a little peace in here?
Little Girl (God): I'm all about giving you peace, Joan.
Joan: Who names their kid Storm? Was his dad in the X-Men?
Grace: I'm just a simple anarchist trying to get through my day.
Adam: So it's stoke-o-rama for the Rove-ster.
Joan: Who?
Adam: I have no idea.
Adam: If we were married I would be Mr. Joan Girardi.
Adam: My girlfriend is the Wonder Woman of Arcadia High.
Grace: Dude, you're contributing to global warming -- and you're handing over vital information to the CIA. When they take that picture? That's really a retinal scan.
Luke: I'm getting my license, Grace. I'm not starting a covert war.
Joan: Is this, like, pillow talk for you two?
Personable Woman (God): They should really put benches at all the bus stops. Make the world a better place, one tush at a time. What do you think, Joan?
Joan: God says "tush?"
Joan: It doesn't make any sense.
Personable Woman (God): It's a paradox. You're a hero. And you're not perfect. You were horrible to Dylan because you cared. Another paradox. If you accept that they both can exist simultaneously, then you can find peace in the contradictions, which is where you'll find me.
Luke: I'm getting my driver's license, Grace, and there's nothing you can do or say to stop it. The missile has been armed, the launch codes have been keyed in, and that sucker's gonna fly. You hear me?
Grace: Fine.
Luke: Look, I love the planet, Grace, but I also love the spirit of discovery that has brought us precision engineering and automotive excellence. I mean, the automobile has been the cornerstone of economic advancement throughout the past one hundred years, and I am not gonna be the one to plunge our global economy into chaos and ruin.
Grace: Fine.
(Grace leaves)
Luke: (sighs) If she wants to break up over this, fine.
Friedman: That was manly, dude. I think I'm tingling a little.
(Friedman is quizzing Luke for his upcoming driving test)
Friedman: "If the solid line is on the outside and the dotted line is on the inside"-
Luke: (a little annoyed) Please stop quizzing me.
Friedman: If I were sixteen, I'd want you to do it for me. There's a lot riding on this, man. Us on the open road, wind in our hair, two gorgeous babes in the backseat.
Luke: Me driving my mom's station wagon. There's paint cans in the backseat.
Friedman: Okay, it's a fantasy. Don't kill my buzz.
Luke: Grace was right. There are ecological ramifications.
Friedman: Are you seriously considering not getting your driver's license because of her? Because you cannot let her put your you-know-what's in a you-know-what.
Luke: You know? I'm at once confused and disturbed by what you just said.
Friedman: This is it, man. This is the driver's license. This is every male child's dream. This is our gateway to freedom, our talisman of virility. This is it. This is...
(They see a hot read car in the parking lot)
Luke: V-10 engine.
Friedman: Ha ha ha.
Luke: 500 horses. Zero to 60 in 3.9 seconds.
Friedman: I'm gonna pass out.
Luke: Quiz me.
Friedman: Okay, road rage...
