Season 5 |
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| 99 :05x02 - Fantasy Camp (2) (Sep/21/2004) | | The Kyles on on a big vacation and Michael actually breaks into Michael Jordan's room and wears his gear to become popular. But when he meets Michael Jordan himself, it's a big consequence. | | Guest Stars: Al Sharpton as Himself, Larry Weissman as Dealer, Virginia Williams as Bambi, J. P. Manoux as Steve, Nick Von Esmarch as Bob Slobadonnapopovitch, Alan Thicke as Harry Blacktop Jackson, Wayne Newton as Himself, Robert Shapiro as Himself, Michael Jordan (1) as Himself | Director: Dean Lorey
Writer: Kerry Parker, Don Reo | |
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| 101 :05x04 - Class Reunion (Oct/05/2004) | | Michael is reluctant to attend his high-school reunion until a former rival, Bobby Shaw, challenges him to a dance-off which he ends up lossing. | | Guest Stars: Katt Williams as Bobbie Shaw | |
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| 102 :05x05 - The Fellowship of the Baby (Oct/12/2004) | | When an overwhelmed Jr. thinks he is not smart enough to take care of his own son, Michael tells Jr. that "Jr., Jr." is a "magic baby," and that every time he holds him, it will make Jr. smarter. The ploy works, but in the process Jr. becomes somewhat arrogant with his new-found knowledge, so Michael brings Franklin in so that the two geniuses can match wits. Meanwhile, Kady catches Claire sneaking back into her bedroom after hours and threatens to tell their parents, unless Claire does some favors for her. | |
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| 103 :05x06 - Pokerface (Oct/19/2004) | | Michael advises Jr. that it's ok to spend some time away from Vanessa and the baby, but his advice misfires when Jr. invites Jay along to their all-male poker game. Michael decides, in turn, to crash Jay's all-female book club, where they're discussing the latest book by Angeline Boudreaux. | |
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| 104 :05x07 - The Proposal (Nov/09/2004) | | Since Michael and Jay are at a competitionon doing a Karaoke contest, Jr tries to make a great proposal stand to Vanessa but it's both beign distracted by both Michael and Jay officially. So without a choice he propose to Vanessa at the Karaoke Contest and is the winner. | | Guest Stars: Aydiee Vaughn as Woman | Director: Guy Distad
Writer: Kerry Parker | |
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| 106 :05x09 - The Return of Bobby Shaw (Nov/23/2004) | | Micheal's enemy, Bobby Shaw tricks Jr. into signing a contract making Jr. his slave for the rest of his life! When Micheal tries to get him out of the contract,they end up in a dance off. | | Guest Stars: Katt Williams as Bobbie Shaw | |
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| 107 :05x10 - The Wedding (Nov/30/2004) | | Jr. and Vanessa announce that they want to get married in two weeks, Vanessa having told Jr. that she wants a small, simple wedding. Michael and Jay offer to help plan it, but instead of something simple and sweet, they plan an elaborate and expensive ceremony that includes dolphins, a castle and 751 guests. Frustrated, Vanessa tells Jr. he needs to regain control of things, forcing him to decide whether he should stand up to Michael. | |
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| 108 :05x11 - Careful What You Wish For (Jan/11/2005) | | When Jay wishes that Michael would give her the kind of romantic attention that she sees newlywed Vanessa getting from Jr., Michael decides to kill Jay with kindness so he can get back to watching TV and ignoring her. Meanwhile, Franklin tells Kady that he thinks he's too short and goes to great lengths to appear otherwise. | |
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| 109 :05x12 - They Call Me El Foosay (Jan/18/2005) | | Vanessa buys Jr a Foosball game tablet and Jr starts getting addicted that Vanessa begs Michael to stop him from acting a bully. Michael wins but he becomes a selfish winning showoff butting his family down and Jay. To make things worse Kady decides the only way to stop him from the madness, is calling a guy by the name of...El Foo-say. | |
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| 110 :05x13 - Study Buddy (Jan/25/2005) | | Michael feels neglected because Jay is spending all of her time studying for her psychology final which is the week after! He decides to tutor her, but his efforts cause her to fail. To make it up to her, he tries to bribe her professor to let her re-take the test. Meanwhile, when Kady thinks Franklin prefers her smart friend over her, she tries to act more "brainy." | |
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| 111 :05x14 - Sweetheart's Day (Feb/01/2005) | When Jay insists that Michael buy her a present for "Sweetheart's Day," a reluctant Michael comes up with a scheme to base the price of Jay's gift on her attitude towards him at a particular moment. He shares his plan with Jr., Tony and Franklin, hoping that they will follow the lead, but the only lead is straight to trouble.
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| 112 :05x15 - Silence Is Golden (Feb/08/2005) | | Michael reluctantly accompanies Jay on a meditation weekend, where he has trouble following the rule of silence which he breaks. | |
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| 113 :05x16 - The Bahamas (1) (Feb/15/2005) | | When the Kyles arrive at the Atlantis, Paradise Island resort in the Bahamas for their family vacation, Michael announces that all he wants to do is get some rest and relaxation-by himself. But no sooner does he settle into his lounge chair for some peace and quiet than his talkative and annoying golf buddy, Jimmy, shows up and insists that they spend time together. Michael is relieved to find a way out when Jay invites him to the isolated Magic Island so they can have some romantic fun. As their day winds down and it's time to leave, the boat never shows up to take them back and the couple find themselves stranded in the middle of nowhere. | Director: Dean Lorey
Writer: Don Reo | |
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| 114 :05x17 - The Bahamas (2) (Feb/22/2005) | | While at the Atlantis, Paradise Island resort in the Bahamas for a family vacation, lovebirds Michael and Jay find themselves stranded on the isolated Magic Island - along with a rapidly rising tide -- and the only other person there who can help them is Michael's talkative and annoying golf buddy, Jimmy, who refuses to do so since they weren't willing to spend time with him when they had the chance. Meanwhile, Jr. leaves Vanessa and the baby behind so he can enjoy the resort's activities; Tony and Claire hang out at the beach bar and she realizes too late that her island drink contains alcohol; and Kady and Franklin run into his nemesis, Francesco Mumfordi, who has stolen one of Franklin's theories. | Director: Dean Lorey
Writer: Don Reo | |
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| 115 :05x18 - The Remodel (Mar/01/2005) | | When Jay decides that the garage isn't fit as a home for their son, Jr, and his family, she hires contractors to remodel. However, Michael isn't happy with the outrageous price they would be charged, so he and Jr. decide to remodel it themselves. | | Guest Stars: Dom Irrera as Woody | Director: James D. Wilcox
Writer: Ron Zimmerman | |
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| 116 :05x19 - Michael Joins a Gym (Mar/08/2005) | | Michael realizes he can't fit into his favorite pair of vintage jeans, he runs into an old high school friend, the muscular Daryl, who doesn't look any older than when Michael last saw him. He enlists Darryl's help to get him back into shape and, in the process, becomes obsessed with looking fit and buff. | | Guest Stars: Casey Lee as Salesman, Terry Crews as Daryl | Director: George O. Gore, II
Writer: Kim Wayans | |
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| 117 :05x20 - Celibacy (Mar/15/2005) | | When Jay tells Michael that their love life will be even better if they are celibate for six months, Michael is willing to abide by her wishes, although reluctantly. Meanwhile, Franklin and Kady plant some seeds in the ground to symbolize their growing love for each other, but the seeds grow into an ingredient for a love potion that Jay uses to spice up her romantic dinner for Michael. | |
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| 118 :05x21 - Jr.'s Cartoon (Mar/29/2005) | | When Jr. wins a national competition for his cartoon entitled "My Wife and Kid" -- based on himself, Vanessa, the baby and the rest of the Kyle family -- it catches the attention of ABC. Michael becomes Jr.'s agent, but the meeting with the television executives goes badly, crushing Jr.'s dream opportunity, so now Michael has to find a way to rectify the situation. Meanwhile, Claire threatens to break up with Tony unless he can bring some "umph" into their relationship. | Director: Randy Fletcher
Writer: Kim Wayans | |
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| 119 :05x22 - Michael's Sandwich (Apr/12/2005) | | Under a time deadline to catch his flight, Michael tries to prepare his signature, masterpiece sandwich to take with him on the plane. But various family distractions delay his getting to the airport, and his beloved sandwich is searched by suspicious security guards. | |
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| 120 :05x23 - Graduation Day (Apr/26/2005) | | Jay's big day on graduating at her college is just under the way but actually it's being distracted she believes that every little bad thing that is happening is because of Michael. | Director: Craig Wayans
Writer: Aeysha Carr | |
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| 121 :05x24 - Michael Sells the Business (May/03/2005) | | With a lucrative bid from a large company offering to purchase Kyle Trucking, Michael convinces Jay that, if they sold their business, they'd be able to spend more quality time with Jr., Jr. and watch him grow up -- something they wish they could have done more of with their own kids. But the offer goes bust and Michael's nemesis, Bobby Shaw, comes up with a surprising proposal. Meanwhile, Kady and Claire antagonize each other over who gets to spend more time in the bathroom. | Director: Mattie Caruthers
Writer: Kevin Rooney | |
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| 122 :05x25 - R.V. Dreams (May/10/2005) | | Michael wants to visit the Grand Canyon in the new RV that he has bought. A family trip in the RV features getting lost and the fact Michale failed to read the instructions to the RV. | | Director: Damien Wayans (1) | |
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| 123 :05x26 - The 'V' Story (May/17/2005) | | Jay and Michael decided that since they are finally finish raising the kids and that they are all grown up, the two can have some quality time with each other. Jay just has one demand to make of Michael- get a vascetomy. | Director: Tisha Campbell-Martin
Writer: Kerry Parker | |
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